Forthcoming Bio on 'Influential Political and Cultural Icon' AOC Hilariously Titled: 'Take Up Space'

I’ve been known to begin articles with “Can’t make it up, don’t have to.” This is one of those articles.

Moreover, it’s one most fun articles I’ve written in a while. There are a whole lot of descriptors that come to mind for Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, America. “Influential political and cultural icon” is not among them. Nonetheless, that’s exactly one of the glowing phrases you’ll find in the forthcoming biography on the 32-year-old erstwhile bartender, hilariously titled: “Take Up Space: The Unprecedented AOC.”

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 pic.twitter.com/ABynhghPGH

— Hold My Beer (@RealLibSmacker) November 30, 2021

OK, I can run with “unprecedented” —albeit for an entirely different reason — so let us proceed.

Here’s how publish Simon & Shuster describes the book, which has a February 1, 2022 release date.

(Emphasis, mine.)

Sworn in at twenty-nine years old in 2018, Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez was the youngest member of the 118th Congress, and the youngest woman to serve in United States history.

She is one of the most prominent politicians on social media, with millions of followers on Twitter, Instagram, and Facebook, making headlines consistently when she utilizes each platform to communicate her opinions, ideas, and progressive policies.

Now, through essays and reported stories on AOC’s meteoric rise and impact written by New York’s top-tier writers and commentators […] we get an in-depth look at one of the most prominent political and cultural stars in recent memory.

Sounds “edge-of-your-seat” already, right? Ah, there’s more, as the points below tease.

An opening essay about AOC’s unprecedented position in American politics by Rebecca Traister

A contextual look at her place in history of the American left by Tim Shenk

Highlights of pivotal moments such as, The Campaign (by Bridget Read), The Making of the Green New Deal (by Kate Aronoff), The College Years [Oh, please] (by Angelina Chapin), and The Dakota Access Pipeline (by Michelle Ruiz)

What the Green New Deal actually means for climate efforts by David Wallace-Wells

An essay on the role that her beauty plays in her public perception by Rhonda Garelick

Analysis of her social media greatest hits by Madison Malone Kircher

Her relationship with Puerto Rico by Andrea Gonzalez-Ramirez [Um, huh?]

An essay on her rare authenticity by Molly Fischer

How today’s teens see her as the politician of their futures [That, I don’t doubt in the least]

Why I had no idea. [rolling-eyes emoji]

If you feel like you need a shower after reading that hot mess you’re not alone. This 32-year-old former bartender has an arms-length relationship with math, economic principles, history, logic, and common sense at best. Yet the nonsense above reads like she was a Kennedy during the height of that whole mess. Hilarious, of course, given “Take Up Space,” which in the opinion of at least half of America is all she does. Except for the attention-whoring on a constant basis, that is.

NY Mag to Publish Book on AOC that Will Explore the Influence of Her Beauty. Ha Haaaaa Hahaaaaa. Then she opens her mouth and leaves know doubt she’s a post turtle. https://t.co/63RN282oS4

— lucky one USA. (@stewdude59) November 30, 2021

In another ROFL moment, as noted by The Blaze, Fox News contributor Geraldo fired off a tweet in support of AOC earlier this month that I wonder if he’d like to take back: