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Unsolicited Advice: Don't Let Your Kids Grow up to Be Lincoln Project Consultants

Welcome to Unsolicited Advice, the column in which I dispense advice that no one asked for.

This week I saw the most pathetic, immature, low-brow, bullshit political stunt I have ever seen in my career in politics.

At a Glen Youngkin gubernatorial campaign stop a group of people dressed in khakis and carrying tiki torches showed up to pose in front of Youngkin’s bus.

NBC affiliate reporter Elizabeth Holmes seemed thrilled to share the incident with social media, noting that they were chanting pro-Youngkin slogans. She didn’t, however, follow up with any type of journalisming or reportering or the important things that an important reporter person might do in a situation where a newsworthy event is unfolding in front of you. Instead she left it to the internet to explain that it was a hoax. In fact, there’s a good chance she knew it was a hoax from the beginning, and hoped reporting it without any follow-up would be enough to cause a firestorm.

It did cause a storm and as it turns out, the sunburnt marshmallows over at The Lincoln Project (TLP) ended up taking credit for the stunt.

A lot of conservatives believe that TLP had hoped to pass it off as real, but I’m not one of those people. I do believe them when they say they were trying to provide a reminder that Glen Youngkin still hadn’t “denounced” Trump for his supposed “very fine people on both sides” comments. There’s a black man and a woman and two of the group are clearly, identifiably Democrat operatives. Obviously they knew what they were doing, but either way you cut it, it was still the most bizarre and pathetic stunt I’ve seen.

The men who run TLP are living examples of what happens to a man’s soul, conscience and body when he gives himself over to rage, greed and the need to be seen. Those desires make a man soft – and there are a lot of soft bodies over at TLP. Those desires make a man mean – and the men (the only woman on the board is Tara Setmayer and they don’t really let her speak much on their behalf) at TLP are mean, and not in the kind of way that denotes power, but in the way that denotes cowardice. Those desires make a man immature – and the men at TLP are not only juvenile in temperament but one of them is actually accused of grooming underage boys for sex. Those desires make a man arrogant – and TLP’s greatest weakness is their arrogance and it may have finally caught up with them.

When Rick Wilson and his merry band of marshmallows realized they no longer had their finger on the pulse of the conservative movement it rocked their world. During the Tea Party years and through the Obama administration we all had a common enemy and it was easy for all of us to believe we were on the same side. What the unwashed masses like us didn’t know about the consultant class is that those people were never on our side. In fact, those people imagined themselves to be the arbiters of conservative thought and opinion. These are men who genuinely believed that they were the ones setting conservative thought. They genuinely believe conservative thought and opinion trickled down. They mistook our common ground for their own influence.

When the base stepped out of line in 2016 it drove them crazy. Their moms told them they were always the prettiest kid in the classroom…why do these disgusting normies suddenly have ideas of their own? That’s not how it’s supposed to work.

The base rejected the elitist consultants and they’ve been in a rage ever since. Their rage led to greed. It’s difficult to resist the allure of mainstream acceptance. All they had to do was be Republicans who hate Republicans and boom…instant reward. The spotlight was too hard to give up, so they are now trapped in this Republican cosplay hell they’ve made for themselves. The day any one of them declares themselves an actual conservative and rejects Democrat policy or candidates is the day they become completely irrelevant.

They allowed that greed to create a blind arrogance that led them to this stunt this week. The Lincoln Project shuffleboard crew has made the grave error of believing they actually influenced the 2020 elections. In reality, their internet ads didn’t shift an electorate. That election was about fraud, media collusion and an electorate who didn’t think they could do four more years of social war around the President, perpetuated by left wingers and mainstream media. It had nothing to do with TLP but they couldn’t resist the thought that they were finally wrestling back their power.

So naturally, that level of arrogance would not allow them to see that no one in the Virginia governor’s race gives one shit about a tiki torch meme based on a lie. Parents are wondering if their children will be assaulted in their school bathrooms while Democrats call them domestic terrorists for daring to actually show up at school board meetings and complain.

It was the type of stunt that a freshman political science major might make up. He’s grown up in a sheltered home where mom always assured him he was the best at everything and dad withheld his affection but showed love by making sure his son never had to pay any consequences for his behavior. He believes every idea he has is the best idea, and there could be no downside. When the world sees his brilliance they will bend to his will.

TLP consultants are those petulant college freshmen who happened to trip into a landward current and then pretended they got to shore by swimming. They have completely misestimated their influence and it led to this blunder.

And a blunder is exactly what this stunt was.

These men imagine they’re some kind of political hit squad. They go to bed at night dreaming of themselves walking in unison in slow motion – cue heroic music.

In reality they are a bunch of clowns. Worse, they’re a bunch of coddled man-children who can’t accept the fact that they don’t own the public discourse and millions of conservatives don’t want anything to do with their intellectual demands. They’ve been throwing a tantrum for years because the unwashed masses refuse to worship them.

Moms, don’t raise these sons. Don’t coddle your young men. Raise humble men. Raise thoughtful men. You do this by raising a man who doesn’t think he’s better than everyone around him. A humble man has the heart of a servant. He is curious and passionate and is willing to learn and willing to take on the consequences of his actions.

Don’t let your sons grow up to be marshmallows. We’ve got enough of them and if there is justice in this world someone will finally throw their puffy asses on the campfire and watch them roast.