Wurst-Case Scenario: The Oscar Mayer Wienermobile Crashes in Chicago

M.P. King/Wisconsin State Journal via AP

We Americans have been through a lot in the last few weeks. We have seen the attempted assassination of a former president, the director of the agency charged with protecting him resigning in disgrace, and the withdrawal of another president from his reelection bid due to, we feel certain, his increasingly obvious mental and physical deterioration. A lot has happened, and a lot is expected to happen over the next few weeks.

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But sometimes, no matter what kind of things are popping, something comes up that is so dramatic, so overwhelming, that it strikes such a blow to the American consciousness as to overshadow everything else. On Monday, one such event took place in Chicago: The Oscar Mayer Wienermobile was in a crash that tipped the iconic vehicle on its side. The extent of the damage is not yet known.

The Wienermobile hit a car Monday morning along Interstate 294 and its driver lost control and overcorrected, causing it to roll onto its side near the Chicago suburb of Oak Brook, Illinois State Police said.

No injuries were reported after the crash, which prompted the closure of the right lane of northbound I-294 for more than an hour, officials said.

A spokesperson for the Oscar Mayer brand, which has several Wienermobiles, told the Chicago Sun-Times it’s “grateful that everybody involved is safe and there were no injuries.”

Sadly, this isn't the first such incident affecting the Wienermobile.

 

An American icon, the Wienermobile first took to America's highways and byways in 1936, the first one being built by Carl G. Mayer, Oscar Mayer's nephew. Since then, new models of mobile sausage have been introduced in 1952, 1958, 1969, 1975, 1988, 1995, 2000, 2001, 2004 and 2008. At present, six Wienermobiles operate throughout the United States, although, sadly, as far as I can ascertain, we Alaskans have had to make do without the Wienermobile's presence. Like the various vehicles in the 1966 "Batman" series, there are other Wiener variants, including the WienerCycle, the WienerRover, and the WienerDrone. 

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In May 2023, the company renamed the vehicle to the "Frankmobile," but public outrage at this defiling of a national treasure forced the company to change the name back to the original.

The drivers of the six Wienermobiles are known as "hotdoggers" and they are charged not only with driving the Wienermobiles along the roads of America but also meating and greeting fans. Hotdoggers have many duties aside from driving:

Actual Hotdogger job duties include sharing photos and videos on social media, answering questions about the brand and the vehicle (the most frequently asked question is if there’s a bathroom in the back, to which they respond, “No, it’s not a Weenie-bago”), and distributing swag.


See Related: Best of Times, Wurst of Times: Cheating Scandal Rocks Nathan’s Competitive Hot Dog Eating Contest

Pro 'Eater' Joey Chestnut Endorses Vegan Hotdogs, Promptly Gets Banned From 4th of July Contest


Fortunately, in this latest unfortunate incident involving one of America's greatest icons, the Chicago-area accident does not appear to have badly damaged the Wienermobile. With a little luck, this Wienermobile will be rejoining its fellows in short order, spreading joy and wiener paraphernalia across the fruited plain once more.

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This seems appropriate.

 

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