From the Women Making Bad Life Decisions file comes word that more and more aging women are opting to become single mothers, presumably after giving up on finding a man with whom to build a family. A new report says that the number of unmarried women over the age of 40 deciding to go it alone on motherhood has doubled since 2007. While it's still a small percentage of women overall, data from the Centers for Disease Control (CDC) shows that more than 1% of babies were born to unmarried women 40 or older in 2024. And that percentage is expected to grow in the years to come.
This is a terrible trend that is bad for both baby and mother. Ignoring the fact that a full 40% of babies are now born to unwed mothers – what are we doing here, society? – aging women having babies comes with all sorts of risks and puts the children of these single-mother households in danger of falling behind their peers who are raised in healthy families with both parents.
Let's just start with this: it's selfish. I'm not talking about women who adopt, foster, or otherwise raise a child without the benefit of a husband; there are myriad reasons that might happen and these women should absolutely be supported. I'm talking about the woman who, having failed to prioritize finding a father for her children, gets the old turkey baster treatment because she won't be denied becoming a mother. Which, of course, proves what conservatives have been saying for years – it's natural and desirable for women to want to be mothers.
It's far less desirable for women to go it alone because it's the children who suffer. Children need fathers. It's that simple. The desire to be a mother does not override the baby's right to be raised by both parents. Yes, many single mothers do an admirable job raising children, but a mother can never be a father because fathers provide something distinct. They are a stabilizing presence within families, a source of authority and protection, and, quite practically, another adult with whom to share parenting duties.
Then there's the fact that the older mother is disadvantaging their offspring from the get-go by getting pregnant at an advanced maternal age. It's just a biological fact that older mothers have higher rates of complications such as gestational diabetes, hypertensive disorders, Cesarean delivery, and even stillbirth. Looking good in your LuluLemon yoga pants doesn't mean your inside stuff isn't feeling its age, and it's a fairy tale to believe otherwise.
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Economically, households headed by single mothers do not tend to fare well at all. Raising children is expensive, and modern life leaves very little margin for error even in homes with two incomes. In one-income homes, the financial vulnerability is amplified: if you get sick, lose a job, face a childcare disruption, or encounter housing issues, there is no second income to steady the family and soften the blow.
The numbers don't lie. A Congressional Research Service summary of Census-based poverty data reports that female-headed households with no spouse present have far higher poverty rates than married-couple families (about 21.8% vs. 4.3% in 2024). This is just the reality of the situation, and it's the children who bear the costs when adults don't prioritize stability.
And that leads to the larger issue: the failure of modern feminism and it's promise that women can “have it all.” What a load of crock. The movement told women they could delay having a family indefinitely with no tradeoffs, that their career should always come first – it's the only life affirmation you'll ever need! – and that marriage is optional and men interchangeable also failed to tell them about reality. You get old. Men don't want to have kids with old women. Parenthood is expensive. Kids aren't accessories, but they are time consuming. Your wants are second to their needs.
A conservative perspective doesn't demand perfection of mothers and fathers, nor does it mock those who have to make difficult choices. It simply insists we stop lying to ourselves. Children deserve the best odds we can give them. Those odds are most often found in what previous generations understood by instinct and experience: a mother and father committed to each other, raising a child together with the support that marriage uniquely provides. And do it young. Trust me on this one.
