I'm going to belabor the obvious here and make the flat assertion that boys should be raised to be men. No confusion, no non-binary, no three-spirit genderqueer; men. The primary role models boys have are their fathers and grandfathers, which speaks a lot to the problems many of our major urban areas are having with feral youths now; no fathers, no grandfathers, and the result? Lord of the Flies, in our urban neighborhoods.
There are a couple of aspects to this. Boys should be raised not only to be men, but to be good men.
My own father and my grandfathers had a huge influence on me in my young life, and in the case of the Old Man, well into my middle-aged life. The Old Man was a rock, a good man, a great man, a man of iron integrity and enormous personal strength, to whom I will strive to live up to for the rest of my life. When he passed away a few years back, my brother and I were talking about him, sharing some memories, and I commented, “You know, we two, you and I, are the men we are today because of him.” My brother agreed. It’s been over seven years now, and I’m still struggling with the empty place in my life where a giant once strode.
Children – especially boys – need fathers. A nearby, engaged grandfather can fill the role. My father did this for my sister’s twins, as their father had abandoned the twin sons he had been a sperm donor for before their birth. But most grandparents aren’t able to be full-time role models, and in most cases, there can be no substitute for a full-time, fully engaged, responsible, and yes, manly father.
There are things that a boy should be taught:
First, a boy should be taught to be self-sufficient. I was taught how to fish and hunt from a young age. At 15, I could run a trapline, dress and skin a deer, catch fish, handle a rifle, handgun, or shotgun. I could drive a variety of farm and earthmoving equipment. I could drive my father's pickup and his 3-ton Ford dump truck.
These things will vary from place to place, of course. But the upshot is that a man needs to know how to provide. Which brings us to:
Second, a boy must be taught to take care of a family. This is best done by example. My father and my friends' fathers all worked. If something needed fixing, they fixed it. If a child needed a good talking-to, a father should be ready to do that.
Third, a boy must be taught to commit. Any idiot can be a sperm donor, but it takes a man to be a father. A father should be a part of his children's lives - to help teach them, to be an example for them, to provide for them, and to teach them how, when the time comes, to take care of themselves.
Finally, a boy must be taught the value of keeping his word; of honesty, honor, courage, and persistence. My father was always telling me, "If you take a job, you finish it."
There is, of course, no reason women - mothers - can't do these things as well. But if someone in the household needs to take a job shoveling manure to keep food on the table, the father should be ready to do that.
See Also: British Labour Politicians Already Seeking Ways to Evade Supreme Court's 'Women Are Women' Decision
Purpose is the key. Any man - any adult - should have a purpose. And yet Western society today seems to be churning out young men with no sense of purpose, in great quantities.
But consider this: As I’ve said repeatedly, I think we are entering the last phase of this cycle:
- Hard times make tough people.
- Tough people make good times.
- Good times make weak people.
- Weak people make hard times.
A man with a purpose may not be gone, just on hold. Because when we circle back to the first phase, we’ll need tough people. Indeed, the tough people may be the only ones who survive the final phase. We'll need men who can work, who can provide, who can commit - and today's boys will have to be those men.
