Chafee Blames Doomed Presidential Run on the Metric System

chafee2Remember 2015? It was a simpler time. Most of us were at least slightly optimistic about the future and hadn’t yet been robbed of our will to live by the bizarro-world election from hell.

It was a time before our daily existence was focused on vile personal behavior or North Korean levels of political corruption.

It was a time when Rhode Island Governor and U.S. Senator Lincoln Chafee had big dreams for America. Dreams about how to measure things. But America just wasn’t ready to give up her furlongs and hogsheads.

Chafee on failed presidential bid: Metric system emphasis ‘a big mistake’

In an interview published this week by Esquire Magazine, former Rhode Island Governor and U.S. Sen. Lincoln D. Chafee acknowledges he probably should not have made the “metrics system” a top plank in his quixotic run for president of the United States.

“My wife said, no, it will be misunderstood. And she was right,” he said.

Anyone with a deciliter of common sense knows a candidate should listen to his wife when it comes to including trivial nonsense in his campaign platform.

“Unfortunately, my crossed fingers didn’t work, and it just turned into more of a joke about metric, not ‘let’s look at the bigger picture.'”

Chafee did not address whether his campaign also suffered because he was always being mistaken for Steve Doocy’s grandpa.