Dark Winter Joe Biden is at it again. I may have to find another profession for the next four years if this keep up.

My colleague Nick Arama outlined the fear porn in Biden’s latest speech to ring in the Holidays. Merry Christmas?:

“As with anything Biden, it’s never what he claimed, now that he thinks he’s got power.

“Listen to what he says now. Things are not going to get better under him, he says, they’re going to get even worse[….]

Biden: "Here's the simple truth: Our darkest days in the battle against COVID are ahead of us, not behind us. So we need to prepare ourselves — to steel our spines, as frustrating as it is to hear. It will take patience, persistence and determination to beat this virus" pic.twitter.com/h6QbtNkfBo

— CBS News (@CBSNews) December 22, 2020

“If you thought states were trying to control you already, sounds like it’s going to get worse with Biden, despite the over 99% survivability of the virus for most Americans and the new vaccines developed with Trump’s help.”

Note Biden’s slurring his words—he can’t even pronounce “frustrating” correctly. So, while Biden drools and dithers about what he will do when he becomes President, President Trump came out swinging about the craptastic COVID Relief Bill, and it was epic to behold.

I’m so glad President Trump continues to let Slow Joe know that he is still the President of the United States and therefore, he is the one getting things done. The President was on point, kicking ass, and taking names.

Let’s break it down:

“Throughout the Summer Democrats cruelly blocked COVID relief legislation in an effort to advance their extreme left-wing agenda and influence the election. Then a few months ago, Congress started negotiations on a new package to get urgently needed help to the American people. It’s taken forever. However the bill they are now planning to send back to my desk is much different than anticipated. It really is a disgrace.”

Trump calls out Queen Nancy and her calculated machinations, and places the blame squarely where it belongs: with the Democrats and with the Congress. He doesn’t soft peddle on this turd of a bill. It is a disgrace, and the fact that Congress did a ridiculous song and dance to promote and pass it only makes it even more egregious.

But what this most reflects is why people voted for President Trump in the first place: He hears and sees the American people and is willing to go to the mattresses for us. While Congress is finding ways to pacify and cheat us in order to maintain their status quo, Trump is finding ways to assist the American people in getting our lives and livelihoods back.

Trump continued:

“For example, among the more than 5,000 pages in this bill, which nobody in Congress has read because of its length and complexity. It’s called the COVID Relief Bill. But it has almost nothing to do with COVID.”

Damn straight, and now every elected official has egg on their faces. Once again, COVID was the excuse to get Congress and the Senate’s pet projects covered. When the President begins to rattle off all the money given away to foreign nations, then arts organizations that are going to be closed down anyway, it’s eye opening. He quotes Millions and Billions with double digits in front of them and all Americans see is Red—from anger, and from the growing deficits that their grandchildren will have to pay. But that’s a mere drop in the bucket compared to…

$7 million for reef fish management. $25 billion to combat Asian carp, $2.5 billion to count the number of amberjack fish in the Gulf of Mexico, a provision to promote the breeding of fish in federal hatcheries.”

This is a truly sweet deal if you’re an aquatic creature or a pregnant fish. Wonder which lobbyist swung that one?

Then it gets really bizarre…

$3 million in poultry production technology. $2 million to research the impact of downed trees. $566 million for construction projects at the FBI.

If a lobbyist falls in the forest, does he make a sound? Hopefully whoever came up with that piece of fat felt the sting of the President’s rebuke.

But where President Trump really gets lit is the part of the bill that gives more money to illegal aliens than to American citizens. He treats it like the rank insult that it is:

“The bill also allows stimulus checks for the family members of illegal aliens, allowing them to get up to one thousand eight hundred dollars each. This is far more than the Americans are given. Despite all of this wasteful spending and much more the nine hundred billion dollar package provides hardworking taxpayers with only 600 dollars each in relief payments. And not enough money is given to small businesses, and in particular restaurants, whose owners have suffered so grievously. “

If you’re a citizen, you get $600; if you’re undocumented, you get double that?! Who does Congress’s math? Or was this deliberate? I’ll take “Cold-Blooded Calculations” for $300, Alex! This is also after Pork-Barrel Pelosi took to the House floor on Monday to say, in part,

 “We can accept the short-term because we’ll have a new president during the length of that moratorium to extend it further, if necessary.  We also have in the legislation direct payments, which were not in the Republican bill – to America’s working families. I would like them to have been bigger, but they are significant and they will be going out soon.

“The president may insist on having his name on the check, but make no mistake, those checks are from the American people. The American peoples’ name should be on that check, no individual, because that is the source of the resources for those checks: tax-paying Americans.”

Amazing that Queen Nancy had that moment of realization while applying her Fixodent; and all it took was four years of Trump. So this hardworking, tax-paying American would prefer to not have her money given to illegal aliens, and our President agrees!

Trump finally lit into Congress’s ill treatment of small business:

“They [small businesses] were only given a deduction for others to use in business at their restaurant for two years. This two year period must be withdrawn, which will allow the owners to obtain financing and get their restaurants back in condition. Congress can terminate it at a much later date, but two years is not acceptable, it’s not enough.”

There are racehorses receiving more help from this relief bill than struggling restaurant workers.

— Chef Andrew Gruel (@ChefGruel) December 22, 2020

The Congress’s response was small business? I thought we’d killed them all! While others like California Governor Gavin Newsom’s Plump Jack Winery concerns got fat on PPP and still remained open, the real small businesses in the nation, who managed to hang on, are one closure away from sure death—which is why so many of these government stooges are intent on more lockdowns, not less. They wish to drive the final nail into the coffin.

Here is where Trump actually gives an object lesson on how government should work:

“Congress found plenty of money for foreign counties, lobbyists, and special interest, while sending the bare minimum to the American people who need it. It wasn’t their fault, it was China’s fault. Not their fault. I am asking Congress to amend this bill and increase the ridiculously low $600 dollars to $2,000 dollars or $4,000 for a couple.

“I’m also asking Congress to immediately get rid of the wasteful and unnecessary items from this legislation and to send me a suitable bill or else the next administration will have to deliver a COVID relief package. And maybe that administration will be me, and we will get it done.”

I remember something in Civics class called a line-item veto… this sounds a bit like that. Either way, the President—and Trump is still our President—holds those powers. If Trump does veto the bill, it will take a two-thirds majority in both houses of Congress to overturn it.

My colleague Jeff Charles sharpens this knife a bit more:

“Trump’s remarks come amid a bitter battle over the proposed legislation. Both Democrats and Republicans are taking issue with the content of the bill, noting that funding seems to be going to anything but Americans who have been impacted by the coronavirus.”

Fifty House Republicans and two Democrats (Rashida Tlaib and Tulsi Gabbard), and 6 Republican Senators voted against the COVID Porkulus bill. You already had other Democrats, like Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, who voiced their displeasure but voted “Yes” anyway. Some of them are actually now reading the bill—does Nancy think she can wrangle them again after that? Will Cocaine Mitch be able to work his magic?

I have my doubts, and even more so after Queen Nancy pretended to play nice on Twitter:

Republicans repeatedly refused to say what amount the President wanted for direct checks. At last, the President has agreed to $2,000 — Democrats are ready to bring this to the Floor this week by unanimous consent. Let’s do it! https://t.co/Th4sztrpLV

— Nancy Pelosi (@SpeakerPelosi) December 23, 2020

Bet she spun that through gritted dentures. Try harder, Nance.

Like Jeff, I expect the outrage over a potential Trump veto to be loud and long from all the usual suspects.

“Nevertheless, Trump’s comments will inevitably be met with wailing and gnashing of teeth from the left. Even though he insisted on bumping up the funding for everyday Americans suffering from the effects of the pandemic, the activist media will find a way to complain about it. But let’s look on the bright side. Won’t it be rather entertaining to watch the mental gymnastics they will engage in to whine about Trump’s request?”

For the next 27 days, Trump can say, “I’m still the President, bitches!” and wield that power. While Biden stumbles and drools, and Nancy clacks her dentures and watches her influence diminish.

This hot bowl of popcorn is tasting real good—Keep. It. Comin’!