In the Atmosphere of Identity, the Sky's the Limit: Swoon to the Sweet Song of 'Bird Gender'

(AP Photo/Mark Lennihan, File)

To those who think neo-pronouns are for the birds: You’re actually right for once.

As delivered by Twitter’s Libs of TikTok, a user named Camryn brings gendered news: If you’ve got quite the beak and are toothless, a special identity’s just for you.

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On the wings of wokeness, take flight:

“Hi, my name’s Camryn, and I’m a member of our DID (Dissociative Identity Disorder) system.”

Birds of a feather go together, and Camryn’s close to a chick named Avery:

“So Avery and I are both birds. I am a cardinal, and Avery is a bluejay.”

The pair “like ‘ey/em/eir’ pronouns,” because they “feel even further removed from gender than ‘they/them/theirs.'”

Plus…they’re birds:

“And being birds, while we do have our own gender expression, we don’t inherently have a gender at all. And not in the way that, like, we’re just nonbinary. It’s that, like, our species as, like, an avian-human hybrid does not inherently have any kind of gender at all.”

It’s a veritable revolution.

“So you use them just like singular pronouns, like ‘he/him’ or ‘she/her.'”

But when writing about the egg-laying birthing persons, how might one accurately allude?

“Spelling- and pronunciation-wise, it’s like ‘they/them/theirs’ without the ‘th’ at the beginning.”

Since “personal pronouns” are — perplexingly — not “personal,” Camryn will never use the pronouns for herself. But for you, practice is pivotal:

“So the best way, I think, to practice is to write out, um, a couple of short sentences using, like, ‘him,’ ‘his,’ and ‘himself.’ And then go back through and erase all of those pronouns and fill them in with ‘ey/em/eir/eirself.'”

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Doubtlessly, there’s robust rehearsal to be done; conventional communication’s been booted from the national nest.

On the bright side, we’re all free as birds. Where identity’s concerned, the world’s your oyster; and you might be an oyster in the world:

University Directs Students to ‘Practice With Pronouns,’ and It Highlights Our Stunning Sophistication

‘Per Loves Perself’: University Schools Students on ‘Why Pronouns Matter’ for ‘Folx’

Students Decry College’s Paltry Pronoun Provisions — There’s Not Even a ‘Mushroomself’

Wokedom’s Newest Confection Takes the Cake: Introducing ‘Cake Gender’

Welcome to the World of ‘Noun-Self’ Pronouns, Now Get Down With Your Bunself

Now It’s Just Silly – University Urges Staff to Use ‘Neopronouns’: ‘Emojiself,’ “Catgender,’ and Worse

Biden Launches Gender ‘X’ Passports — You Can Now Travel as Neither Man Nor Woman

As for notions of soaring beyond the nonbinary, and as for having no “gender at all”…I propose a radical climax to our evolutionary cultural course: What if progress flies so far, beyond binaries and birds and any and all borders of being…’til every one of us is 100% gender-free?

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If by chance we perch upon that futuristic ledge, there’s a name for it ready to ride the wind: From the time of Adam and Eve until around 2018, that word was “mundanity.” Because that’s how our system already worked. Dare we once again become so evolved as to be back where we were before being made new?

Hold on to your hatself; we absolutely may.

In the meantime, if I might say so, Camryn’s crowing on the wrong app. “TikTok” is the sound of a clock, and eirself is a bonafide bird. A bird has no business TikToking — unless, of course, she’s a cuckoo. 

It’s time to migrate to Twitter, Camryn; after all, everyone knows birds tweet.

-ALEX

 

See more content from me:

19th Century Bank Adds Pronouns to Teller Name Tags, Invites Unwoke Customers to Close Their Accounts

Boston University Publishes List That Connects Students to Teachers With Similar Sexual Interests

Jordan Peterson Is Suspended From Twitter After ‘Deadnaming’ Elliot Page

Find all my RedState work here.

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