Q: How do you sink a North Korean ship?
A: Put it in the water.
North Korea, that rogue Stalinist state inexplicably run by a hereditary monarchy, claims to be nearing completion on a nuclear submarine, to be armed with nuclear weapons. While North Korea does have nuclear weapons and missiles, a bit of skepticism is probably in order in this case.
North Korea on Thursday displayed apparent progress in the construction of a nuclear-powered submarine, with state media photos showing a largely completed hull, as leader Kim Jong Un condemned rival South Korea’s push to acquire the technology.
North Korea’s official Korean Central News Agency said Kim visited a shipyard to inspect the construction of what the North describes as an 8,700-ton-class nuclear-propelled submarine, which the leader has called a crucial step in the modernization and nuclear armament of North Korea’s navy.
The North has indicated it plans to arm the submarine with nuclear weapons, calling it a “strategic guided missile submarine” or a “strategic nuclear attack submarine.”
Here's what the thing looks like.
Color me skeptical. pic.twitter.com/9sz25IAaB6
— Ward Clark (@TheGreatLander) December 25, 2025
I'm no naval architect; the only time my service brought me anywhere near oceans was when I flew over them to go somewhere where, for the most part, my boots stayed dry. But this doesn't look convincing to me; this looks like a mock-up, and North Korea's leader, that stunted little gargoyle with bad hair from a long line of stunted little gargoyles with bad hair, doesn't exactly have a reputation for being on the up and up.
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We might remember that, not all that long ago, another of North Korea's vaunted naval accomplishments sank alongside the dock, which hardly inspires confidence. Still, setting aside skepticism for a moment, let's just say that this thing is for real, and Chairman Kim will now have a nuclear-powered, nuclear-armed submarine at his beck and call; that's going to make a lot of people in the Philippines, Japan, and possibly Taiwan pretty nervous. But it's one submarine, and President Trump has indicated a willingness to share technology with South Korea to match and hopefully surpass any North Korean efforts.
During a summit with Trump in November, South Korean President Lee Jae Myung called for US support for South Korea’s efforts to acquire nuclear-powered submarines, while reaffirming a commitment to increase defense spending to ease the burden on the United States.
Trump later said that the United States is open to sharing closely held technology to allow South Korea to build a nuclear-powered submarine, but it’s not immediately clear where and when the vessel would be built and how Seoul would get the nuclear fuel and reactor technology required.
A little perspective is in order. As of this writing, the United States has 70 submarines; Russia, 63; and China, supposedly 61. Japan has 24, and we might remember that Japan has been dialing its military back in, increasing its readiness to a level we've not seen since 1945. North Korea has a small fleet of 13 conventional diesel-electric boats at the moment.
Our fleet also includes the Virginia-class fast attack submarines, which were specifically built to hunt other submarines, like this supposed North Korean one.
Here's the catch. Any prospective North Korea missile boat, like any "boomer," only has to survive long enough to launch its missiles.
We'll be keeping an eye on this development. Will it be a real threat? Or will it sink alongside the dock? Stay tuned.
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