I want to show you a video of a woman. In fact, it's a video you've probably seen before, even if it's not this particular woman who's featured.
As you can see, in the beginning, this woman is cocky, self-absorbed, and ready to make demands of men she's never met about how they can treat her to a date if they want to get with her.
The second half of the video is as hilarious as it is heartbreaking. This woman's ego has left her alone, and with her biological clock ticking its final ticks, she's resorting to desperate measures to try to make children an option in her future, though her egg count is very low according to tests she's taken. She tells us all this through tears.
The wall is undefeated. It's all bad b-tch attitude until it's too late.
— Joker (@BachelorJoker) December 21, 2025
Same woman after father time decides to visit. pic.twitter.com/cQnmhSFk4F
"I just feel this giant pain in my stomach right now," she says before the video stops.
The thing is, this isn't rare in this day and age. While there are men who participate in displaying their childless lives like peacocks display their feathers, it's primarily young women consistently posting explanations as to why being childless is their greatest asset. They're often smug, holding up middle fingers to those who are sounding the alarm about declining birthrates and condemning the flaunting of selfish behaviors.
Exhibit A:
@z00mie we hold the future in the palm of our hands fr
♬ original sound - zoomie
If you read the comments on this particular TikTok, you'll see an army of young women applauding themselves for not having children. You'll find that it is, itself, a common theme among the thousands of videos just like this one. It's all bragadocious behavior as they flaunt their excess money, peaceful mornings, naps, and late nights.
The issue is that these people post about it a bit too much. In fact, there's one account on TikTok whose entire schtick is posting stories she sees online from parents who regret having children. So far, she's up to 108, and I find that very interesting, because that kind of dedication to a topic usually only happens when they see it as a problem that affects the self and needs to be fixed.
Another interesting thing is that you see a lot of child-free women over the age of 40 posting as well, and each of them is spiking footballs...repeatedly. The subject continuously comes up on their pages.
In the words of the great Ron Burgundy...
I'm not going to sit here and say that every single childless woman who aged out of motherhood regrets their decision. Some women I know who are childless are, in fact, perfectly happy having never had one, but I do notice that these women don't spend a good chunk of their time talking about how happy they are. They just live their lives.
I think that the more honest ones are more like the first woman. Cocky, dangling their income and peace over the heads of those who think the lifestyle isn't the wisest course, and then regretful once the door closes. There is a growing number of women who post these tearful confessions. Moreover, the numbers show the real story. Only seven percent of women 45 or older who had children regret having had them, but 56 percent of those who didn't ever have kids wish they could go back and have them.
Regret having children? Or not having any? It's mostly one directional.
— Emil Kirkegaard (@KirkegaardEmil) September 22, 2024
Among 45+ year old Americans:
7% of those with children would have 0 if they could go back.
56% of those without children would have some if they could go back.https://t.co/IQ8RbJo3bQ pic.twitter.com/jvsm58kbpV
Let's be brutally honest about parenthood for a second.
It's hard. My son is now three. He's feral, can be a tyrant, and is oftentimes impossible to deal with. I find myself having to sometimes walk away due to my own frustration and anger with him, especially when he's being defiant while being punished for being bad. Just this morning, we had our first come-to-Jesus moment when he wouldn't stop kicking the glove compartment of my truck and putting his feet on the center console.
It was a hard moment for me because I had to transform my own moment of unrestrained anger into a teachable moment for him. He had to learn that there are lines, and when Daddy draws them, crossing them has consequences. He understood the message, we both said sorry to each other, and we hugged it out after I wiped his tears.
Now, this morning could've gone differently. I could've woken up at 9 a.m. instead of 6:30. I could've just gone downstairs in my pajamas and had a quiet cup of coffee while I caught up on current events instead of getting into warm clothes to drive him to day care in the cold. I could've taken my time writing articles and editing YouTube videos today because there's no pick-up time. I could worry about what I'm going to eat tonight before I go out to a New Year's party instead of trying to plan what this picky little toddler might want to eat around 5.
My greatest frustration could've been a dog that thinks her job is to stare out of the backyard fence and bark at passersby while I stand there in the cold waiting for her to finish using the restroom, not feeling a pang of heartbreak for losing my temper with a small boy who doesn't have the emotional or intellectual tools to regulate his newly discovered independence and trying to make sure he learns the lesson while impressing upon him that he's well loved despite my anger.
I'm walking a much more difficult path than the childless men and women on TikTok.
But so what?
What those people will never experience is what I did this morning, where, after my son and I finished the lesson, we hugged each other tightly for a while. They'll never experience the heartmelting moment of a small child who finally understands that they did wrong, saying "sowwy" while putting their tiny hand on yours. They won't later feel the joy of seeing their child's face light up when you appear to pick them up, and the happiness that comes with them running toward you while shouting "Dada!"
Do I feel jealous of their free time? Their clean house and disposable income? Am I jealous of their peace and lack of physical and emotional challenges? Am I jealous of their uninterrupted sleep?
Absolutely.
Would I want to swap places with them?
Are you out of your mind?
I was 39 when my son came into the world. I had a lot of time to enjoy free time and money, and endless sleep after long nights of partying. It was fun, but it wasn't fulfilling. It was easy, but it lacked meaning. I didn't truly understand that until he arrived.
I like this better. Most of the people who have kids agree.
When I watch these people brag about their childless lives, I can't help but get the impression that they're doing two things. The first is dangling their glamorous life over the heads of other women who haven't put on makeup in three weeks, have stains they can't identify on their clothes, and have bags under their eyes. It often feels like they're sneering at mothers, but reading between the snide remarks and displays of ease, I can't help but feel an anger there. I don't think even they associate with jealousy yet, but I feel it is germinating for these younger women.
The other is that they're trying to convince themselves their lives are superior. There's an element within them that doesn't believe their own hype, and they continuously speak about their happiness to drown that voice out.
I'll pray for these people because I have a feeling that in about a decade, they're going to need prayer.
