Ever since my little boy came into the world, I've steadily become a different person than I was before he was around. The more he grows, the more I do, or at the very least, the more I notice my perspectives change.
My dad always told me that having a child does something to you, and if I'm being completely honest, I can't fully describe what that something is. I can tell you I pay attention to certain things a lot more than I used to. I've become a lot less passive when it comes to certain things that could harm my child's mind. I know I've become a lot more patient than I was before by leaps and bounds, and I've become a lot more appreciative of little moments.
I'm not going to say I'm an "experienced parent" with only a year and a half of being one under my wing, but I've now gotten to a point where I can guess with some accuracy whether someone has a kid just by the way they express an opinion about a certain topic. Some people will come off as ignorant despite having full-blown confidence in what they're saying, strictly because they're expressing this opinion as someone who has never had the life of a completely dependent tiny human that they love without question completely in their hands. Their entire experience on dependency comes from owning pets which, compared to children, is hardly the same in intensity and necessary dedication.
For instance, I wrote about this earlier, but the people who believe that "trans kids" should be a thing are very often childless themselves. They can say with utmost certainty that a child should be able to walk into a hospital and have the doctors mutilate their bodies through drugs and surgeries because they identify as a sex they're not. This was a take given by popular streamer Charlie White.
Brain dead, childless take from @MoistCr1TiKaL, who I actually like. wtf is this opinion Charlie? pic.twitter.com/HWxIK2yjMb
— Brandon Morse (@TheBrandonMorse) July 28, 2024
If White had a child that he loved implicitly, I have a very hard time believing he would reach this conclusion, or at the very least, it would be far more nuanced than it actually is here. The argument that children, even those as old as 14 or 15, can know that they're not the gender their body says they are is ridiculous. Just a few years ago, they were swearing up and down that they were unicorns and T. rex's. Their brains haven't fully developed to understand the logic looming over their emotions.
Another childless take is the idea that true happiness is a selfish life. You see this often online, usually from female creators. Take this one, for instance.
Imagine being 42, child-free, stress-free, and being this happy.
— Angela Belcamino (@AngelaBelcamino) July 28, 2024
The right hates this. pic.twitter.com/7EW0w0agpg
Is being child-free less stressful? Absolutely. At nearly two, my son is a gremlin who has two modes; asleep or going wild. When he's not in the house, I feel my muscles relax and my focus return.
But ease does not make for happiness. The question isn't whether your life is easier, the question is whether your life is filled with joy. That little gremlin is a joy to have. He gives my life far more purpose than something beyond myself and represents something much larger than me. Watching him grow is like watching a slow miracle unfold right before my eyes. My life is harder with him in it, but far better overall.
I don't need to use the "when you're on your deathbed, you'll want to be surrounded by your children and not your cats" argument. I can tell you that the joy is in the present, turning these little gremlins into proper people.
But the grandest of childless takes are the ones I see in positions of power. I'm amazed at how often school boards are made up of childless bureaucrats. There are an ungodly amount of people in teachers unions making decisions about how children should be taught and raised. Many in the medical community who say that children should be able to undergo life-altering, irreversible surgeries have no children of their own.
To be clear, I'm not saying that you have to have a child to understand the world around you. I'm not saying that childless people shouldn't have an opinion or a say in matters, even those pertaining to children. There are plenty of people out there with children who are equally ridiculous about their takes.
But there's definitely a knowledge and experience gap I can't help but notice. A lack of care for children that people with children tend to have. A tempering of outlooks here and a more intensifying outlook there. Things that seemed so important before are now laughably shrug-worthy.
Now, every time I see someone give a ridiculous opinion, usually about children, I can't help but think "childless take."
