Brad watches the debacle so you don’t have to! Refresh throughout the night for updates.
Hollywood’s biggest night is upon us, and the ceaseless waves of apathy generated by that announcement are palpable across the land. Those over-burdened with fame (and underserved by self-awareness) will be busy congratulating themselves while lecturing us what we are doing wrong in our lives.
The producers have given lip service to these awards being less political, but as my podcast partner Sarah Lee notes, that will be a stretch. There are a number of pressing issues and celebrities cannot help themselves. The Time’s Up leaders have said they have an allotment carved out in the show, plus Jimmy Kimmel is hosting fresh off of a year of him transforming his talk show into a social awareness platform. Granted, he has shown himself to be abjectly incorrect on subjects such as healthcare, net neutrality, the CHIP insurance program, tax cuts, and the government shutdown — but hey, as the press points out, he is our nation’s conscience now!
The industry that has been fostering decades of sexual abuse will lecture us on why sexism is wrong.
Gun control will be highlighted by the performers who profit from gun violence and released “Death Wish” this weekend.
The players who have called Donald Trump a Nazi for years will talk about the poisonous divisiveness in Washington.
So get ready to be told what a horrid individual you are by those who belong in therapy, in a muzzle, or incarcerated.
7:03pm
Apparently in a nod to the abuses in the acting world the Academy is going with the 90 SCARS tagline?
7:05
You can relax folks, our Hollywood bettors, who want us to be disarmed because guns serve no purpose, are safely guarded on the red carpet tonight by armed security!
7:15
Turns out Ryan Seacrest has just become one of the latest to be accused of being a scumbag towards women. That will curtail some of the #MeToo #TimesUp #NeverAgain red carpet interviews. Deadline reported that Ryan will be on a 30 second delay, just in case an unplanned discussion erupts.
7:42
Being conservative means always having to grit teeth with entertainment. Composer Lin Manuel Miranda probably hates me on the basis of being a Republican, but his music from Moana should have won a trophy last year.
8:05
The Jimmy Kimmel monologue actually addressing the sex scandals. Rather refreshing.
8:08
Kimmel comments on the flap of Mark Wahlberg getting millions to reshoot a film where Michelle Williams was paid thousands. This was due to the contracts but, of course, Kimmel gets the facts wrong.
8:10
A joke about Mike Pence being upset about a film with gay characters — because Pence has absolutely nothing to do with Hollywood, so let’s cheap-shot away.
8:20
Kimmel had a gag where he’d give away a jet ski to the shortest speech of the night. So millionaire actors who could buy a fleet are said to compete for this, when the winner will probably go to Best Foreign Film because they cannot speak English, and merely say “thank you”.
8:42
A documentary concerning Russia wins, and Kimmel cracks “At least we know Putin didn’t rig this competition.” I guess Jimmy forgets that President Obama assured us that Russia did not affect our elections. Sounds like “America’s Conscience” got another one wrong…
9:09
During his introduction to present Kumail Nanjiani had to bring up immigration and give a shout out to all the Dreamers, for the category of Best Production Design. Then Shape Of Water wins the category, which was mostly shot in Canada.
9:37
Kobe Bryant just won an Oscar for Best Animated Short, which I am completely sure was well-deserved and not at all a bit of pandering because he played for the LosAngeles Lakers.
10:00
Jimmy Kimmel has a stunt where a crowd of celebrities will visit a theater to thank movie patrons for their business. This is a stark turnaround from the usual Oscar tradition, which is telling the movie-going public how they are backward-thinking and out of touch.
10:24
Hollywood has finally learned its lesson and had some of Harvey Weinstein’s victims actually coming out and speaking. Ashley Judd, Salma Hayek, and Annabella Sciorra come out to introduce a segment promoting diversity in entertainment. It’s hard to tell if this is Hollywood saying they finally understand this as an industry, or if they are lecturing us how we are supposed to think of this.
11:04
In this #MeToo #NeverAgain climate is it wrong of me to say Jennifer Garner may be winning the Best Dress that should be removed category?
#NotSorry
11:28
The glacial pace of this ceremony makes one wonder how so many in that room believe in global warming…
11:46
“The Shape of Water” wins, and the whole night was actually worth it to see Sally Hawkins on stage. As for my predictions, I went 12-4, my misses being the longer shots of my picks. My sure-things, and Best Picture all landed. So this should prove I don’t know JUST bad films!
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