It's a new year, and that means we are reaching for a new level of absurdity. Sure enough, it didn't take long for the goods to be delivered. For example, did you know Stephen Hawking was mentioned in the newly-released "Epstein documents?" 

As RedState reported, the unsealed documents, which had previously been redacted to protect the names of the rich and famous involved, were derived from a civil lawsuit brought by Virginia Giuffre, one of Jeffrey Epstein's underage (at the time) victims. The most notable "John Doe" that was uncovered was former President Bill Clinton, while many other well-known individuals were either named or implicated. Then there's Stephen Hawking, who was a wheelchair-bound, world-renowned physicist and author before his passing in 2018. A fair warning, this is where things get really weird. 

According to the documents, Epstein once offered a reward if someone could disprove Giuffre's claim that Hawking had participated in an underage orgy while visiting Epstein's infamous private island (he was there in 2006).

“You can issue a reward to any of virginias friends acquaionts family [sic] that come forward and help prove her allegations are false,” the late pedophile wrote in a typo-ridden email to his madam, Ghislaine Maxwell, on Jan. 12, 2015. 

“The strongest is the clinton dinner, and the new version in the virgin isalnds that stven hawking partica-ted [sic] in an underage orgy,” the email concluded.

It appears that Epstein was trying to find inconsistencies in Guiffre's claims to hurt her chances in court. By disproving the claim about Hawking, it would presumably harm the victim's credibility. Whether anything came of that isn't known, and to be clear, I have no idea whether Hawking somehow participated in an underage orgy. 

Still, the memes that came out in response to this news were absolutely glorious. 

Stephen Hawking as soon as he arrived to Epstein Island pic.twitter.com/Jj9qFLppCC

— Not Jerome Powell (@alifarhat79) January 4, 2024

Madison Cawthorn hearing that Stephen Hawking was able to attend orgies. pic.twitter.com/o3H1n5FNZW

— Stephen Lloyd (@apparentlysteve) January 4, 2024

Stephen Hawking as soon as the plane touched ground on Epstein’s Island pic.twitter.com/kv44VUXp4f

— Noah (@PrimeNoah24) January 4, 2024

Hey, I tried to warn everyone that 2024 was going to get even dumber, and here we are. Sometimes all you can do is sit back and laugh as the world burns. There is no level of insanity that will not eventually be reached as society trudges forward, including allegations that Stephen Hawking had an underage orgy on Jeffrey Epstein's pedophile island. So there you go, welcome to 2024.