When you're going 90 miles an hour, as a lot of us do in our day-to-day routines, it's easy to forget to appreciate those simple moments where there are no pressures of the day, where it's just you and your loved ones sitting back and shooting the breeze about whatever tickles your fancy.
As I've talked about before, I've gotten much better at recognizing such moments when they occur between mom and me because 1) it's good to have them, and 2) it's important to build up a good stock of memories like these to hopefully be able to look back on in the future.
This has been one of those challenging months where mom has several doctor's appointments scheduled. We just got done with one a few days ago (routine dermatology visit), but next week are the biggies: it's time for her latest round of CT scans and lab work, and the closer we've gotten to those appointments, the more antsy we have gotten.
SEE ALSO (VIP): Caregiver's Diary Part 84: The Most Precious Moments of All
One day this week, as mom and I were waking up and preparing to get ready for the day, she informed me she had a headache in a place she doesn't usually get them. Mom rarely gets headaches, and when she does, most of the time they are mild and go away after she takes a couple of Tylenol.
But this one bothered her enough that it caused her to change her normal morning routine. Instead of immediately getting dressed, she went into the living room, took a couple of Tylenol, and relaxed in the recliner. Because I was a little concerned, I changed up my routine, too, and joined her in the living room, telling her I'd sit with her a bit until she (hopefully) felt better.
While she was resting, instead of turning on the TV like she or I normally do once we get in the living room in the morning, I logged onto the laptop just to check email and see what the day's news was looking like, and caught up with a few odds and ends online things while I had the laptop on.
At a certain point, Mom started talking to me about something random. I don't remember what the subject was, but it had me shutting down the laptop so I could pay attention to her and enjoy our time with each other at a time when my mind wasn't preoccupied with 1,100 things.
The conversation had us naturally shifting from one topic to another, laughing and carrying on, with the highlight being when we both looked out the window and saw not only a male cardinal on one of the bird feeders but also two goldfinches. Their colors were so beautiful to see, and they all managed to co-exist long enough to get some food and water before fluttering off and continuing to go about their day.
DIVE DEEPER: Caregiver's Diary Part 83: Evenings With 'Mr. C'
By the way, if you've never seen a goldfinch in person, they truly are a sight to behold. Here's an image I found on X:
Five goldfinches and one house wren - there is no social distancing at this restaurant pic.twitter.com/o1cXVjqOym
— Heather R. Higgins (@TheHRH) June 4, 2020
We didn't use to see them here that much, but there must be a family of them nearby because we see them just about every day now.
But back to the conversation with mom, it was like time stood still for about half an hour or so. There was no TV on, no laptop on, and our phones were on the tables next to us. There was no thinking or talking about the upcoming appointments. In fact, there was no thinking about anything beyond that moment. We just enjoyed and appreciated each other's company, and the time we had to connect with each other before the hecticness of the day cranked up.
We've probably done this before in the morning, but I think this time in particular was the first morning I stopped to recognize it for what it was, and how it made a positive impact on the rest of my day.
It made such an impact on me that I've suggested to my mom that we do that more often, where we make a concerted effort to take the first half hour of each morning after we both make it into the living room to leave the electronics off or muted while we have a chat about whatever happens to be on our minds.
It's amazing how the simplest of things end up being the most gratifying; the moments we most cherish, isn't it?
RELATED: To check out my previous Caregiver's Diary entries, please click here. Thank you!
