Apparently, the Democrat party is pivoting to its Magic Mike phase in order to draw in the female vote.
Axios just dropped a straight-faced report about the resistance party trying to win elections by posting thirst traps of their “desirable” men as they try “bringing sexy back.”
That's right, the party that brought you excessive amounts of tofu and soy in the male diet, who thought Minnesota Gov. Tim Walz (D) and his perpetual jazz hands could draw in the menfolk by serving as a "code talker" for white guys who enjoy sports and trucks, and who famously foisted "Pajama Boy" upon us during the Barack Obama years, thinks the ladies are gonna come a-runnin'.
How? Promoting "thirst traps" of their male politicians.
"Democrats seem to be leaning into a specific midterm strategy, especially on socials: bringing sexy back," Axios writes. "Unbuttoned shirts on CNN. Exposed biceps on the rally stage. Made-for-TikTok thirst trap b-roll. And the return of the tan suit."
"The left is leaning into candidates who look young, energetic and even desirable, with fresh faces often eclipsing the older guard."
Democrats enter their thirst trap era https://t.co/qbDpJNgPZK
— Axios (@axios) August 18, 2026
Good Lord. The next time somebody tries to sell Axios as a straight-laced, unbiased bastion of impeccable journalism, simply show them that report.
Now, you do have to applaud the Democrats for making an attempt to draw in women voters by noting biological differences between men and women and focusing on what they find attractive. Just kidding, the Axios report doesn't mention women at all, leaving it open-ended as to who they're trying to attract.
The only mention of females is that the party is giving screentime on their social media accounts to the likes of AOC and Michelle Obama as well. Beyond that, they point out the evidence of their "desirable" men thusly:
The party's main TikTok page has given big names the thirst trap treatment, including: Sen. Jon Ossoff (D-Ga.) (nicknamed "Senator My Boo" by internet fans), Michigan Senate candidate Abdul El-Sayed in his tight-fitting T-shirts, a grinning NYC Mayor Zohran Mamdani and former President Obama with a touch of gray, among others.
"Senator My Boo" was recently accurately described by President Trump as looking like "Pee-wee Herman." (He's a rebel, Dottie).
El-Sayed's 'Sharia Til I Die' mantra might not be all that appealing to the ladies. They probably shouldn't trust any kind of trap from that dude.
And if a grinning, Cheshire Cat-looking perpetual dolt like the terrorist-adjacent Mamdani is your cup of tea, then, well ... good luck to you. Here is how the Democrats have been promoting this particular "desirable."
Now, if I'm Texas Senate candidate James Talarico (D), I'm a little miffed that Axios didn't mention me in their drooling report on the men of the Democrat party. After all, just a couple of weeks ago, they were promoting him as the model of manliness.
This guy.
November, here we come. pic.twitter.com/ux1w1WzGNO
— Democrats (@TheDemocrats) May 27, 2026
Seriously, who had Pee-wee Herman versus Richie Cunningham battling it out over who is the sexiest Democrat politician on their Bingo card?
Fortunately for everyone involved, Graham Platner is no longer in the running; otherwise, we might be forced to look at TikTok "thirst trap" videos from the portapotty.
Remember when the Democrat Party commissioned a $20 million study to figure out how to appeal to young male voters? In it, young men revealed they couldn't relate to the party because "Democrats are seen as weak," and they made them feel "stressed, ashamed and confused over what it means to be a man in 2025."
That party now thinks Ossoff, Mamdani, and El-Sayed are the definition of an ideal male.
Look, I'm not going to pretend to be an authority on the matter, but it's a pretty safe bet that any party in which Eric Swalwell is a leading scorer with women, particularly Chinese spies, doesn't really know what constitutes "desirable."
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