This Memorial Day weekend, as we honor the fallen, and we’re getting together with our families and friends to BBQ, please remember the reason you have a day off.
When I think about what this day means to me, I’m thinking about the unbreakable bond that defines military service. In the cockpit, on the flight line, in the foxhole, or aboard the carrier — you don’t just serve alongside people. You become family with people. My 20 years were simply the most rewarding, growing, maturing experience of my life.
I’m particularly remembering, among the too many to name, my father, Major General Robert B, Patterson (USAF); and my close brothers like First Lieutenant Mike Hodge (USAF) and Captain Tim Shafer (USAF).
You may have read my column about Tim on Friday. In case you missed it, here's part of what I wrote:
In 1995, I was an Air Force squadron commander, and my squadron of 220 personnel and eight jets deployed from Travis AFB, CA to Rhein Main, Germany, to fly into Bosnia during the Bosnian War.
We had our headquarters in Germany and flew into Bosnia daily, delivering our troops, diplomats, senior officials, humanitarian aid, and yes, journalists.
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One of my stellar copilots was Lieutenant Tim Shafer. Also a great friend. Back home at Travis, I hung out quite a bit with Tim and his wife away from work. Birthdays, Napa wine tastings, skiing up at Tahoe, you name it. I chose Tim as one of my hand-picked pilots because he was that good.
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Military assignments can be crazy. Tim and his wife were reassigned a few months later to fly T-43s at Ramstein AB, Germany. They were really excited about it!
Shortly thereafter, Tim was the pilot who crashed and died in the Clinton Commerce Secretary Ron Brown crash in Croatia. On April 3, 1996, Tim was piloting his T-43 full of corporate CEOs and Brown on an official trade mission. Flying an NDB approach (non-directional beacon) into Dubrovnik. Thirty-five people onboard died.
The USAF called the accident “pilot error.” I’ve never bought that conclusion.
READ MORE: Buzz Cut: This Memorial Day Weekend, Remember Our Heroes! Lieutenant Tim Shafer
Mike and Tim were pilot buddies of mine. One on the East Coast and one on the West. We shared apartments, laughs, birthdays, families, missions, and the weight of the uniform.
When the engines spool up and the mission is real, that brotherhood is what carries you. You trust them with your life because they’ve already proven they’d give theirs for you.
That bond doesn’t end when the uniform comes off or when one of us makes the ultimate sacrifice. It lives on in the stories we tell, the flags we place, and the promise we keep to never forget. Never, ever forget.
RedState's Jennifer Oliver O'Connell wrote up a column on how people can remember those we have lost for Memorial Day.
READ MORE: A Wounded Warrior Shares the Meaning of: 'No Bad Days,' How to Best Honor the Fallen on Memorial Day
True leadership understands this. You equip your troops, back them with resolve, and never leave them behind. From my days carrying the Nuclear Football to flying C-141s around the world, I saw it time and again: the strength of our military isn’t just in the hardware — it’s in the warriors who stand together!
To every veteran, active duty troop, and Gold Star family — thank you for living that brotherhood! America is free because you refused to let it fall.
This weekend, as you grill and enjoy time with family, take a moment to remember the ones who made it possible. Pour one out for the fallen. Say their names.
I’ll be saying “Bob Patterson,” “Mike Hodge,” and “Tim Shafer.”
Who will you be remembering this Memorial Day?
