Our weekly recognition of less-than-meritorious excellence in journalism is worthy of Pulitzer Prize consideration.

As an extension of the media-mocking venture at Townhall, Riffed From The Headlines, we once again recognize the exalted performances in our journalism industry and compile worthy submissions to the Pulitzer Prize board in numerous categories. To properly recognize the low watermark in the press, let us get right to the latest exemplars of journalistic mis-excellence.

Believe it or not, there were other media screwups this week beyond the Jeff Zucker Follies

Distinguished Explanatory Reporting

• Brad Dress – The Hill

The University of Nebraska has descended into the woke mascot swamp by issuing the order to redesign the school’s athletic symbol. Herbie Husker is the caricatured image of the Nebraska farmer, replete with a cowboy hat and a pair of overalls emblazoned with a bold letter “N,” clutching a football, with a large ear of corn protruding from his pocket. If you are wondering what the offense is here, you may want to sit down, lest your knees become weak.

That hand gesture could, in some circles, represent something that does not represent what Nebraska athletics is about,’ Henrichs said. ‘We just didn’t even want to be associated with portraying anything that somebody might think, you know, that it means white power.

So, another mascot is changed regarding potential insensitivities. And, as usual, no white supremacists were asked how they felt about the change.

University of Nebraska mascot's hand gestures revised to avoid connection with white supremacy https://t.co/yh6gDhFYzB pic.twitter.com/8mvcKTH8tv

— The Hill (@thehill) January 31, 2022

Distinguished Local Reporting

• Robert Pandolfino – WFLA Channel 8

Florida has a tendency to put its own spin on things, and this week for Groundhog Day, it was no different. Down in Marathon Key, at the Florida Keys Aquarium Encounter, they have a live conch that acts as a tropical version of the meteorological varmint in Punxsutawney. Their mollusk came out of its shell and saw its shadow, which — as we all know — means six more weeks of high tide.

Florida 'Groundhog' conch sees its shadow https://t.co/H5YiYOkmsQ pic.twitter.com/6mChMSTlRb

— WFLA NEWS (@WFLA) February 2, 2022

Distinguished Investigative Reporting

• Nathaniel Meyersohn — CNN

EDITOR: “Okay, we are going to need some pieces that will distract people from our scandal with Jeff Zucker. C’mon people, what can we run?? Nate — what do you have?!”

MEYERSOHN: Umm, I have that expose’ on the CVS receipts being so long, that you keep spiking.

EDITOR: (after a long blank stare) “Okay, fine – run it. We’ll take anything at this stage…”

The curious case of long CVS receipts https://t.co/lWqfHhJdt1

— Nathaniel Meyersohn (@nmeyersohn) February 1, 2022

Distinguished International Reporting

• Adina Bresge — Globe And Mail

We have now descended through the maple-looking glass. The Canadian truckers convoy has been impactful and draws huge crowds of support – and the normally protest-enthused press cannot stand it. There has not been a single reported incident of violence taking place, but here we are; we cannot call THIS protest non-violent because something just might…uh, happen…?

Police haven’t reported any physical violence at the ongoing Ottawa rally against vaccine mandates and other government-imposed COVID-19 restrictions, but critics warn that conflating the absence of bloodshed with ‘peaceful’ protest downplays the dangers of the weekend demonstrations.

So, for your scorecards:

– Dozens of deaths and billions of dollars in damage = NON-VIOLENT

– Truckers honking their horns = VIOLENT

Calling the Ottawa protests ‘peaceful’ downplays non-violent dangers, critics say https://t.co/2emfRa5Jpc

— The Globe and Mail (@globeandmail) January 31, 2022

Distinguished National Reporting

• Pilar Melendez — The Daily Beast

Ms. Melendez is energetically working to break open this case of a New Jersey police chief who was photographed at a Christmas gathering last December in controversial clothing. With little hint of shame, Melendez details for us that the chief dared to attend an ugly sweater party, wearing a covering with the ghastly phrase “Let’s Go Brandon”

The best is that the reporter has contacts at the ready on such matters, citing the stern words of — a Christmas sweater expert.

EXCLU: Police Chief Wore ‘Let’s Go Brandon’ Sweater to Christmas Party

Experts and residents were enraged at the embrace of a far-right catchphrase at an “Ugly Sweater Party.”https://t.co/N0uByRg93H via @thedailybeast

— Pilar Melendez (@pbmelendez) February 4, 2022

Distinguished Cultural Commentary

• Rebecca Alter – Vulture

The good news is that now that COVID restrictions are ebbing, the celebrities are starting to get out, and the PR firms can once again spit out useless news nuggets for the tabloids to start Hoovering up for content. It was such an innocent time, this Monday, before the Zucker sex scandal.

In those beatific days, we could occupy ourselves with simple pleasures like Rhianna walking around with her stomach out in public. The pregnant singer was splashed across social media for a day, her new baby bump on display for the world. Over at Vulture, Ms. Alter delves into the vital aspects of this story — like how much would it cost to give the singer free publicity???

It’s not an exclusive or anything, just a Shutterstock download. Stans that we are, we caved and very frugally bought only one of the many photos in the shoot.

It was $1,500.