Depression Be Thy Name: Twitter Says Trump Will Never, Ever Be Allowed Back

AP Photo/Manuel Balce Ceneta

For those suffering Trump-tweet withdrawal, I have exceedingly bad news: You’ve been damned to eternal torment.

So says Twitter Chief Financial Officer Ned Segal.


During an appearance on CNBC Wednesday, Ned nailed shut any door for The Donald to reenter the Twitterverse.

As reported by the outlet:

As for Trump returning to Twitter one day, the company’s CFO Ned Segal made it clear Wednesday that’s not an option. Segal told CNBC’s Squawk Box Wednesday that Trump would never be allowed to return to the site, even if he decides to run for office again.

As noted by The Daily Wire, “This means we could potentially have a president that is barred from the vital platform, underscoring Big Tech’s power.”

Is it really vital?

Not according to my great grandfather.

Then again, they didn’t even teach race-conscious math when he was in school.

Perhaps the younger types would like to know their Commander-in-Chief can whip up a pithy 280 characters.

The Bluebird kicked the Leader of the Free World from its nest on January 8th, just 12 days before he flew south for the winter. Now at Mar-a-Lago, perhaps he’s conjuring a new direct route to the masses.

As for his eviction from America’s primary means of insulting one another, it was “due to the risk of further incitement of violence.”

Here’s Twitter’s “comprehensive analysis“:

On January 8, 2021, President Donald J. Trump tweeted:

“The 75,000,000 great American Patriots who voted for me, AMERICA FIRST, and MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN, will have a GIANT VOICE long into the future. They will not be disrespected or treated unfairly in any way, shape or form!!!”

Shortly thereafter, the President tweeted:

“To all of those who have asked, I will not be going to the Inauguration on January 20th.”

Due to the ongoing tensions in the United States, and an uptick in the global conversation in regards to the people who violently stormed the Capitol on January 6, 2021, these two Tweets must be read in the context of broader events in the country and the ways in which the President’s statements can be mobilized by different audiences, including to incite violence, as well as in the context of the pattern of behavior from this account in recent weeks. After assessing the language in these Tweets against our Glorification of Violence policy, we have determined that these Tweets are in violation of the Glorification of Violence Policy and the user @realDonaldTrump should be immediately permanently suspended from the service.


We assessed the two Tweets referenced above under our Glorification of Violence policy, which aims to prevent the glorification of violence that could inspire others to replicate violent acts and determined that they were highly likely to encourage and inspire people to replicate the criminal acts that took place at the U.S. Capitol on January 6, 2021.

This determination is based on a number of factors, including:

  • President Trump’s statement that he will not be attending the Inauguration is being received by a number of his supporters as further confirmation that the election was not legitimate and is seen as him disavowing his previous claim made via two Tweets (1, 2) by his Deputy Chief of Staff, Dan Scavino, that there would be an “orderly transition” on January 20th.
  • The second Tweet may also serve as encouragement to those potentially considering violent acts that the Inauguration would be a “safe” target, as he will not be attending.
  • The use of the words “American Patriots” to describe some of his supporters is also being interpreted as support for those committing violent acts at the US Capitol.
  • The mention of his supporters having a “GIANT VOICE long into the future” and that “They will not be disrespected or treated unfairly in any way, shape or form!!!” is being interpreted as further indication that President Trump does not plan to facilitate an “orderly transition” and instead that he plans to continue to support, empower, and shield those who believe he won the election.
  • Plans for future armed protests have already begun proliferating on and off-Twitter, including a proposed secondary attack on the US Capitol and state capitol buildings on January 17, 2021.

As such, our determination is that the two Tweets above are likely to inspire others to replicate the violent acts that took place on January 6, 2021, and that there are multiple indicators that they are being received and understood as encouragement to do so.


Surely many in the media are already missing Trump.

As covered by RedState’s Bonchie and Scott Hounsell, one journalist compared himself and others during #45’s term to soldiers storming the beaches of Normandy.

Now, it seems, the press is still on the beach — only now, they’re sipping Margaritas.

Many a civilian tweeter may miss keeping track of Trump as well.

To hear Ned tell it, all we’ll ever have again is the right to reminisce.

At least — that is — until another social media monstrosity takes hold.

Until that time comes, for those of you dealing with the DT’s (that’s Donald Trump)…sing it with me:

And for the music historians among you, these were reportedly the full lyrics to that song:

Boy, the way Glen Miller played.
Songs that made the Hit Parade.
Guys like us, we had it made.
Those were the days

Didn’t need no welfare state.
Everybody pulled his weight
Gee, our old LaSalle ran great.
Those were the days

And you knew where you were then
Girls were girls and men were men.
Mister, we could use a man like Herbert Hoover again.

People seemed to be content.
Fifty dollars paid the rent.
Freaks were in a circus tent.
Those were the days

Take a little Sunday spin,
Go to watch the Dodgers win.
Have yourself a dandy day
That cost you under a fin.

Hair was short and skirts were long.
Kate Smith really sold a song.
I don’t know just what went wrong
Those were the days




See more pieces from me:

Japanese Olympic Committee President Warns the Addition of ‘Annoying’ Women Will Necessitate Limiting Their Talk Time

Culture Catches Up for the Kiddos: ‘Blue’s Clues’ Reboot Teaches Children the Letter ‘P’ is’ Full of Pride’

Ready, Aim, Fire: Military Sets Its Sights on Bases With Confederate Names

Find all my RedState work here.

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