Just in time for the world’s favorite religious holiday — if you’re looking for the perfect gift for that prayerful friend or family member, you’re in luck: This year, you can feed the religiosity of your politically-aware loved one with a prayer candle.
Etsy’s got several options, and they’re made with — according to the materials listed on the official product page — “wax, glass, liberal sweat, heart, soul, feminist agenda.”
The candles are offered by Atlanta’s Blue Otter Goods, and they’ve collected an impressive five stars over 388 reviews.
Not too shabby.
And it gets better: The 8″ Progressive Patron Saint Devotional Prayer Candles feature your favorite ecclesiastical figures.
Here’s a list of the orthodox options:
• RBG: Our Lady of Everlasting Dissent (with dissent collar Ruth Bader Ginsburg)
• Liz: Patron Saint of Planning (Elizabeth Warren)
• Nancy: Our Lady of Perpetual Shade (Nancy Pelosi)
• Elijah: Patron Saint of Public Service (Elijah Cummings)
And last, but certainly not least:
• AOC: Patron Saint of Zero F***s (Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez)
If you’re downright frustrated that you’ll only be able to stock up on 5 kinds, have no fear — Blue Otter Goods has Holy Hope and Change on tap:
LOOKING FOR OTHER DESIGNS? CHECK MY OTHER LISTINGS!
Barack Obama, Robert Mueller, Ruth Bader Ginsburg, Maxine Waters, Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, Nancy Pelosi, Stacey Abrams, Barack Obama, Michelle Obama, Joe Biden, Hillary Clinton, Kamala Harris, pete buttigieg, Mayor Pete, Tear Down the House, Nasty, Mothers day, Elizabeth Warren, Women of The Resistance, Warren 2020
And you’ll be happy to know each Tribute & Dissent Progressive Prayer Candle is only $13.95. Or snag a 5-pack for $59.95.
So if you or anyone you know have grown tired of the old saints — Francis of Assisi, Thomas Aquinas, or that most famous of all gatekeepers, Peter — enter the gates of super spirituality via the left-wing legends of that haven of virtue, modern-day Washington.
…Trump supporters are a cult.
— Dead Agent (@Recursion_Agent) December 11, 2019
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