'Best and Worst States for Retiring Americans'—Are They Really, Though?

It seems like we see a new one of these "best and worst places for Americans to retire" analyses every month. They are all different, and all of their conclusions reveal, very plainly, the presumptions and attitudes of the organizations that complete such studies.

So when a new piece emerged Saturday on the best and worst states for Americans to retire, I took a look at it. And the conclusions are... mixed.

Bankrate, headquartered in New York City, evaluated all 50 states on data points to help determine where people might spend their golden years.
Some of the factors include living costs, health care costs, crime and overall well-being.
"The reality is that most Americans feel behind on saving for retirement, which means affordability is critical," Alex Gailey, Bankrate analyst, told FOX Business in an emailed statement.
"A move to a more affordable location could be an effective way for soon-to-be retirees to stretch their retirement savings in this economy."

Those aren't entirely unreasonable criteria, although these kinds of things never take into account how widely people's values vary. I know people who live in places like Virginia and New York who would never dream of leaving, while a herd of bison tied to a bunch of D-9 Caterpillars could not drag my wife and me out of our Susitna Valley, Alaska home.

These things are very subjective. But let's have a look at what the Bankrate folks determined to be the best states to retire.

1: Delaware.

"While Delaware is a pricier state to live in, the state’s high-quality health care, light tax burden, affordable homeowners insurance and good weather propelled it to the top spot this year," she said.
"Delaware also scored well in diversity, wellness and culture, and has a high share of residents who are age 62 and older compared to its population."

I can only describe my own preferences, as I'm not a mind-reader, but I don't give two hoots about "diversity," and tiny eastern states give me claustrophobia. I need room to breathe. So, no thanks.

2: West Virginia.

This state was the best in terms of affordability — but Bankrate did note that it is the worst state for quality and cost of health care.

I've been through West Virginia any number of times, although I've never spent serious time there. I can see some appeal, though: Affordable real estate, good outdoor opportunities (hunting, fishing), and a lovely landscape.

3: Georgia.

Bankrate moved Georgia up from 15th place since last year, saying the state has become much more affordable.

I can't vouch for that; other than connecting at the notorious Atlanta Hartsfield/Jackson airport, I haven't spent any time in Georgia since the late '90s. But what I do remember are the summers - no thanks.

4: South Carolina.

The report found the Palmetto State scored well in the weather category and fell in the middle of overall well-being and quality and cost of health care; also, crime also dropped.

There's a lot of interesting history in South Carolina, not least of which is the many connections to our Civil War, which is an interest of mine. But again, the summers? No thanks. But the Palmetto State does have the advantages of reasonable government, as I understand it, and it's affordable, according to a couple of folks I know who live there.

5: Missouri.

Missouri ranked well in affordability, cost of living and property taxes.
Yet the midwestern state is struggling with its quality of health care, overall well-being, crime and natural disasters, said Bankrate.

When I was a kid in Iowa, we used to twit our southern neighbors with the claim that they were "living in Misery," but our oldest daughter and her husband maintain a vacation trailer home on a campsite on the Lake of the Ozarks, and that Redneck Riviera is as great a place as you'll find. Also, they cite crime, but one is forced to wonder how much crime would be an issue if one just extracted St. Louis from that calculation.

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But here's the part I really liked:

The worst states to retire in, according to Bankrate, are North Dakota, California, Washington, New York and Alaska.
Alaska held last place for the second consecutive year.
The report said it's been "dragged down by back-of-the-pack scores in affordability, quality and cost of health care, weather and crime," according to Bankrate.

For any leftists who are looking for their retirement home, I can only say this: Yes! It's all true! Everything is expensive, everything is awful! The winters - oh, no, those winters! Snow measured in feet, weeks and months of below-zero temperatures! Everyone has guns! Stay away!

My conservative and libertarian friends may well, as we do, find Alaska a desirable place. Prices can be high but taxes are low, and if you hunt and fish you can reduce your food bill by a wide margin. The state government doesn't meddle much in our lives. It's a great place if you're into surroundings that are vast, wild, and free, but like anything, those things come with tradeoffs.

And to leftists, I remind you: The winters! Oh, no, those winters!