There's something to be said for attentiveness.
When I'm out and about running errands or am just in general interacting with people (whether I know them or not), something I try to do but admittedly am not always good at is to look them directly in the eye and show them genuine interest in what they're saying or doing. Or I participate in another way, like holding someone's door or giving them a pat on the back.
And if it is an online conversation (chat, comment section, etc), I try to throw in my .02 and ask questions where warranted during the course of the discussion, to let the person know I'm paying attention to what they're saying.
It's not because I think it makes me a good person; it's just that I know how it makes me feel when someone is being attentive, whether it be with words, actions, or both. It makes me feel like what I say and do, whether big or small, in the course of everyday life, matter
SEE ALSO (VIP): Listen Up
The idea for this column came to mind after having a series of experiences like this in one day, something that doesn't happen often.
Two of them happened at drive-thru restaurants. At one of the places, after I was handed my food items and drink, the cashier helping me said, "Oops, let me have that drink back. It's not full."
I hadn't even noticed, but I was appreciative that she had. Because the drink was for mom, and she has a pet peeve about getting a fountain drink that is not filled up to the top (and that goes double if it's sweet tea!). She doesn't get mad about it when it happens. She'll just shake her head, but I tease her about it all the same.
And honestly, who can blame her? With food and drink prices being the way they are, it's imperative to try to get the full amount of whatever you paid for.
But back to the attendant, as she handed me the drink back, she remarked that she knew how she would feel if someone gave her a drink that wasn't full. We exchanged a couple of more pleasantries, and I went on my way.
At the next place, the person who handed me my order asked me to double-check it before I drove off to make sure I'd gotten everything. That's something I normally try to do anyway, but was not planning on doing on that particular day until the employee mentioned it.
The order was right, minus the ketchup packs I had asked for. That was rectified quickly, with me thanking the person for having me check it (because I get a little grumpy without my ketchup packs).
He said something in response along the lines of "we want to make sure our customers are happy," which was good to hear, considering there are days when I feel like good customer service is on the decline.
These were both small gestures in the scheme of things, but sometimes the smallest gestures can have the biggest impact.
READ MORE (VIP): The Lost Art of Good Customer Service
The other instance was later in the day when I was meeting with a contractor to discuss some things we wanted to have done to the house, and which I wanted to get his opinion on and, of course, a quote.
We walked the property, and at a certain point, we stopped so we could converse more about a particular spot on the house and so I could pick his brain about options that fit in my budget.
It's important to me when I talk to contractors, when there are obvious issues that need to be taken care of, for them to know that I'm not trying to "cheap out" on fixes. Because I'm sure they get a lot of people who need extensive work yet who think they should be able to get a new roof for $2-3,000 or a new HVAC combo unit for $3-4,000 and who think anything more than that is highway robbery.
Not that there's anything wrong with not wanting to save money, but I've learned the hard way that when it comes to home repair, renovation, etc., more often than not, you get what you pay for. Quality work and materials, along with an extensive knowledge base, all come with a price.
In any event, back to the foundation contractor, I was explaining to him that we were committed to investing in the home provided that it didn't veer off into money pit territory, but noted that we were going to have to prioritize a new roof (most likely next summer) over the suggestions he'd made to rectify our brick veneer cracking issues (he recommended two, possibly three helical piles, but assured me the house was not collapsing).
He understood and absolutely agreed that the roof was the more pressing of the two matters, but also looked at me directly and told me we have a nice home that sits on a fine piece of land, and that, previous home repairs or not, it was clear that I loved and cared for the home very much.
That meant a lot to me, because sometimes I feel "judged" when a contractor visits, as if they're thinking "why didn't she do xyz sooner?" considering the things that need to be done. Even though I hadn't said the words, the contractor read between the lines and responded the way he did, showing he had been paying attention not just to what I said, but what I had left unsaid.
Attentiveness. It matters.
