No matter where we are in life, no matter what our personal and/or professional responsibilities are, it's easy to sometimes lose sight of the big picture. It's easy to forget to take a step back to assess our overall situation and focus more on the blessings instead of all the challenges we face - big and small - on a daily basis.
I've written a lot about the uphill battles Mom and I have faced over the last several years in this series, and I've also detailed some of the positive developments. But I'm just as bad as the next person when it comes to getting stuck on occasion in pits of frustration during the course of the daily grind.
It's something I've long known about myself and something I've wanted to change, and so earlier this week, I took a step forward in that direction, putting the worries, fears, and grumbling aside for a few minutes to reflect on some blessings.
SEE ALSO -->> Caregiver's Diary Part 19: Give Yourself Some Grace
Sometimes when I think about my career, I pinch myself, because I've literally been writing in some form or another since I was 12 years old, and it was a dream of mine to one day be able to do it as a career.
At a certain point in life, I just figured it wasn't meant to happen, so I mainly wrote (blogged) as a hobby (and sometimes as a side hustle) while working a full-time administrative job. I would have stayed there had I not been laid off after nearly 20 years.
But that turned out to be a blessing in disguise, because it prompted me to finally pursue my writing dreams, a risk I took that ultimately paid off thanks to supportive family members, friends, readers, and colleagues who have seen things in me that I oftentimes don't see in myself.
Around the same time this was going on, my dad's health issues were starting to become more challenging, and my mom was needing my help more, so the schedule flexibility was a big relief, allowing me to help her more with him and, after we lost him in 2022, to be able to care for her full time.
The months prior to finding out Mom had colon cancer were rough. And after we found out her diagnosis, things got rougher in a different way, with her having to have a couple of surgeries and go through several rounds of chemo that were really tough on her.
But we were blessed with an incredible oncology team, and when they informed us that three months of chemo treatment would give her nearly the same benefit as six months would, we breathed a sigh of relief. Mom wouldn't have been able to handle six months of FOLFOX5. It's pretty intense, as chemo is. But she did get through three.
Her follow-up visits with the doctors, the scans she's had, the bloodwork, all so far have been very encouraging, have given us hope. The next round is roughly a month away, and obviously we're praying for more good news.
But even before we go in, we know how blessed Mom has been in the months and years since she finished chemo, which were years we didn't know we'd have in the immediate aftermath of finding out the news of her colon cancer, when we were so fearful about what the future may or may not have had in store for her.
Through it all, I've seen myself grow, mature, and become strong(ish) in ways I wouldn't have thought possible in my pre-caregiver days. It's a strength that gets tested almost daily (with vulnerable moments definitely making their presence known!), but which is mostly still left standing at the end of the day.
Thank you, God, for allowing us to get where we are, to be who we are, today.
When you're going through the daily grind and you just feel like you can't get the train back on the tracks, try to find a quiet spot for a few minutes and think about the blessings in life, and say a thank you and a prayer to God. Nine times out of ten, doing so will be a game-changer.
RELATED: To read my previous Caregiver's Diary entries, please click here.
