In this entry, there are, thankfully, no wintry mixes on the horizon. Instead, I wanted to talk about some conversations I've had in recent weeks with family members and close friends on the topic of giving yourself some grace. This applies to more than just caregivers, of course, but may have added significance for caregivers considering all the additional responsibilities they (oftentimes) have to try and juggle.

For as long as I can remember, I've not been much of a "rest in the moment" person, though I've tried to be. I've made most decisions with the future in mind more so than the present, trying to lay the groundwork and set conditions to make the next day, week, month, and year better and more hassle-free.

After becoming a full-time caregiver to my mom, this mindset increased tenfold.

SEE ALSO-->> Caregiver's Diary Part 9: 'Resting in the Moment' Is Being Put to the Test

For instance, the way things have been situated around the house has been done with her comfort and care in mind, to help prevent slips and falls and to make the daily routine for her less complicated. In our home, she's in a controlled environment where she knows where things are, the distance from Point A to Point B, etc.  And many of the creature comforts are close at hand.

We even have systems in place for how she can help me with housework since she wants to continue to do whatever she can to keep moving and contribute to the household, and because I, too, want her to keep moving and could also use the help. The systems are designed to keep her mobile and active but not to give her so much to do that she gets tuckered out easily.

But even with all of that, being a caregiver and having to keep up with everything that comes with it can at times be like a swim against a raging current. And that goes double if the person you're caring for has a specific health issue or issues that require extra special handling and care.

One thing I've learned over my time caring for Mom full time, and during the years I helped her care for my dad, is that a caregiver simply cannot manage all the things. They simply can't. As much as we think we can control the situation, the parameters, etc., it's simply not realistic to think you can make everything "perfect" for the person you are caring for, much less yourself.

Nevertheless, I get frustrated at times over my inability to do so. There will be random instances that pop up where I think if only we were doing this one particular thing one way or the other, it would be much easier to manage than the way we're currently doing it.  Like how we do groceries, for instance, or how we keep up with the bills - especially the auto drafts, which keep going up and up and up...

But in the middle of a conversation I had with Mom over the weekend, we both agreed on one thing: we needed to do better at giving ourselves some grace, to realize that we're doing the best we can every single day but that some days things just aren't going to go as we planned for them to.

And that's okay.

So no matter your situation, whether you're a caregiver or not, if you find yourself giving it your all but feel like you're failing because you can't control every single detail and sometimes fall short in the process, give yourself some grace. We weren't meant to be Everywoman and Everyman. 

Sometimes the pizza will burn in the oven. Sometimes you're going to spill something on the lovely sofa or carpet. Sometimes we aren't going to make it to that appointment on time.  Sometimes we're going to forget that one item we REALLY needed to get from the grocery store.

This is just life, and instead of fretting over every detail, give yourself some grace and say to yourself "It's going to be okay. It's just a minor hiccup. This, too, shall pass." And you know what? It will.

RELATED: To read my previous Caregiver's Diary entries, please click here