A Comedy Party With Senators Baucus and Rockefeller

Why The Long Face, Senators?
Why The Long Face, Senators?

Senator Franken from Minnesota may have worked once as a Comedian, but he’s got to brush up his act if he wants to win a comedy slam against Montana Senator Max Baucus or West Virginia Senator Jay Rockefeller. You see, both of these gentlemen were quite the dashing cocksmen during the lamentable fathering of the Senate version of Obamacare. Now, like the prototypical cad served with a paternity suit, they both want to sing the refrain made famous by the rap-artist Shaggy.*


Senator Jay Rockefeller kicked off Improv Night with the following description of his own legislative handiwork. What? You mean your own piece of legislation was bad, Senator Rockefeller? Yepper, Daddy was a pistol, now Obamacare is a son of a gun.

West Virginia senator Jay Rockefeller, one of the main architects of Obamacare, calls the bill “probably the most complex piece of legislation ever passed by the United States Congress.” Referring to the implementation of the bill, he says, “If it isn’t done right the first time, it will just simply get worse.”

While that Rocke Feller was good for farts and giggles, Senator Bacchus** was truly the life of the party.

Senate Finance chairman Max Baucus of Montana has an even gloomier assessment. “I just see a huge train wreck coming down,” he told Sebelius in a hearing last week. “When I’m home, small businesses have no idea what to do, what to expect, they don’t know what affordability rules are, they don’t know what penalties may apply. They just don’t know.”

No Senator Baucus, small businesses back home no exactly what to expect. Charles Hugh Smith has done excellent work on filling them in.

ObamaCare will act as a neutron bomb on employment in the U.S. for two basic reasons:

1. It is immensely complex, and already-marginalized small business owners will shed employees or simply close rather than have to figure out what all those thousands of pages of regulations and statutes mean to the survival of their business.

2. ObamaCare’s primary mechanisms of lowering costs, insurance exchanges and technocratic selection of “best care practices,” do nothing to change the systemic flaws of sickcare.

Many other commentators have already outlined how ObamaCare is driving employers to replace fulltime workers with part-time workers to avoid having to pay outrageously expensive monthly healthcare insurance premiums. In this sense, the ObamaCare neutron bomb is already decimating fulltime employment.


Perhaps, these Democrats can just get past the denial stage and move on to anger. Maybe they can answer President Obama’s next State of The Union Speech with something along the lines of this letter from a disappointed British Dad to his offspring.

With last evening’s crop of whinges and tidings of more rotten news for which you seem to treat your mother like a cess-pit, I feel it is time to come off my perch. It is obvious that none of you has the faintest notion of the bitter disappointment each of you has in your own way dished out to us. We are seeing the miserable death throes of the fourth of your collective marriages at the same time we see the advent of a fifth. We are constantly regaled with chapter and verse of the happy, successful lives of the families of our friends and relatives and being asked of news of our own children and grandchildren. I wonder if you realize how we feel — we have nothing to say which reflects any credit on you or us…I can now tell you that I for one, and I sense Mum feels the same, have had enough of being forced to live through the never-ending bad dream of our children’s underachievement and domestic ineptitudes…

Yet we would never expect that much honesty from either Baucus or Rockefeller. Their career longevity partially depends upon each man disowning his own unique role in the ongoing fustercluck that is now ObamaCare. So they joke around instead. Hopefully the voters who could see their health insurance go up in price by as much as 80% will no longer be laughing. Hopefully, the day after each Senator’s next run for reelection, we can be asking each one in turn. “Why the long face?” But in order for that to transpire, each man’s perspective GOP opponent needs to be asking “Who wrote that stupid bill anyhow?”


* – NSFW, but I linked it in case you wondered.
**-Using the Greek version Dionysus wouldn’t have made that pun quite work.


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