There are people on the Internet who become utterly convinced of their own awesome powers of observation. They read “Red Pill Blogs” and see the real world for how it really is. To these folks, it’s all a big conspiracy* and if they nose through the right Government Documents, they’ll discover the real X-Files. The Kenyan Birth Certificate, Tom Fife’s evening in Moscow, the Metallurgical evidence that fire doesn’t really melt steel, it’s all there on the Internet somewhere – probably in the Man-O-Sphere.

The latest target of these soul-sucking jerks is the recent terrorist attack on The Boston Marathon. The detestable theories are out there, and they have the proximate intellectual content of the average Motley Crue Lyric. Bill Powell of Apocalypse Cometh asks “Where’s The Blood”. I link, but in so doing am ethically conflicted. And also, !THIS!

Aurini of Stares at The World gives us the “Analysis” behind the False Flag accusations. Like the 9-11 Truth Movement demanding that we investigate the LIHOP and MIHOP theories, he makes the argument that the FBI entrapped the Boston Marathon Bomber and that US Foreign Policy breeds new jihadists. Only Prawn Paul can save our wretched Yanqui souls.

When it comes to Speaking Truff to Power, nobody has the courage of their idiocy quite like Alex Jones. Asking Governor Deval Patrick if blowing up one of Boston, MA’s best and most successful tourist revenue generators was a government plot to empower the DHS is mental retardation handed a microphone. My advice to budding, young, cracker-jack investigative reporters: when you make Deval Patrick look like Pericles just by standing next to you, you’re doing it wrong.

I work for the government. I know we are inexcusably corrupt and dishonest. It is blight and a dishonor to the hard–working Americans who pay our salaries that government corruption exists at all and it shames me when I read about. But we are also about as risk-averse as your typical mollusk-colony. The 24 Tennessee IRS workers who falsely collected welfare are better examples of the type of crime your typical GS-Welfare System Worker goes in for.

Things that blow people’s limbs off make these people have to get up off the couch. That’s an operational non-starter right there. The person who did this horrible thing went to some trouble and endured personal risk while building the explosive charges. Nobody with a TSP, employment tenure and locked-in, generous health insurance would be playing around with ammonium nitrate in a sink.

I don’t know who did this atrocious thing. I’ll avoid the autobeclowning that Salon and Infowars have both chosen to experience by avoiding the hatred-driven, premature specujaculation**. The person who did this is unknown – 12 hours after CNN reported him arrested.

This should be a salutary warning to anyone publishing content without CNN’s operational budget or corporate mandate to spew leftist propaganda. The truth is out there somewhere, it will be found eventually by someone thinking rationally and wielding Occam’s Razor. The only false flag operation I’m suspecting here involved giving Davis F. W. Aurini, Bill Powell, Alex Jones, David Sirota or anyone reporting !LIVE EXCLUSIVES! for CNN their High School Diplomas.

*-Never mind Gonzalo Lira’s excellent advice that you ask Lance Armstrong how well big conspiracies really work.

**-Premature Specujaculation involves falsely accusing somebody you hate of something awful in order to score political points and express your contempt.