Everyone Hates John Kasich

John Kasich really tried, for very stupid strategic reasons, to compete in Utah. He wanted to at least keep Cruz down below 50% and get a few delegates for himself, even if that meant Trump got some in the process. He utterly failed. His paltry 16.4% of the vote barely beat Trump who is absolutely despised in Utah.


More importantly, John Kasich finished fourth in Arizona, despite the fact that there are only three active campaigns right now. That’s right, John Kasich lost to a guy who isn’t even running anymore, Marco Rubio. And not by a little bit, either, by thousands of votes.

Kasich won Ohio because people voted strategically to keep those delegates out of the hands of Donald Trump. Kasich misinterpreted that as evidence that people like him, but the results in Utah and Arizona tell a completely different story. Now that Kasich is actively trying to gain delegates for Trump, American voters have seen through his dopey nice uncle routine to realize that Kasich is a self centered narcissistic asshole who is almost as bad as Trump in that regard, which we have always known.

No one wants Kasich in this race anymore. He’s served his purpose. But as long as people keep donating him money, he’s going to still be around, trying to give the nomination to Trump.


And he’ll be the last guy in the room to realize how hated he is when this is all said and done, and he’ll turn his dopey, jowly face to the nearest member of the press and say in pitiable tones that the reason people rejected him is because they really hate Jesus. By which he means John Kasich, because they are basically the same thing.


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