The Cult of Clinton

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Come, and I will tell you a tale that defies rational belief. Yesterday, a relatively humanoid being who has, according to eyewitness testimony, been living on Planet Earth for at least the last three decades penned the following words about the Clintons:

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Because the Clintons are held to a double standard when it comes to media scrutiny. Their perfectly usual, above board behavior is spun as secretive and unaccountable — while Republicans are left relatively unscathed.

Points to paid Soros stooge David Brock for having the chutzpah to voluntarily make himself a laughing stock of the entire country by actually claiming that the Clintons are straight and honest and are the victim of an American media that is actually out to promote Republicans. I mean, you usually can’t find someone to state that sort of opinion out loud unless you are a billionaire who is prepared to pay people handsomely to do it.

But when it comes to the Clintons, there exists a veritable cottage industry of people who somehow find their way onto every television news outlet in the country who are willing to state – with a perfectly straight face – what all of America knows to be baldfaced lies about the Clintons. These shameless priests of Clinton tend to come in two varieties. The first consists of people like Paul Begala, James Carville, and the aforementioned Brock – the rare breed of person whose sense of shame and personal dignity has been so emaciated (due to lack of nourishment) that they are able to face cameras with apparent sincerity and declare that the latest illegal or unethical thing the Clintons have done is neither illegal nor unethical in spite of all evidence to the contrary.

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The second but equally important kind of Clinton priest sallies forth to address the portion of the population who has decided to believe their lying eyes rather than the Brocks and Begalas of the world. This priest wants to tell you how to feel about the Clintons in light of these dirty lies you have decided to believe about them – and the way you should feel is grudging admiration for how very clever and shrewd they are. Thus we have Glenn Thrush saying that Hillary is a “badass” for violating Federal law. Or, back in the days of President Bubba, sitting Democrat Senator Bob Kerrey actually bragging that, “You know, Bill Clinton is an unusually good liar. Unusually good.”

However, it isn’t the Bob Kerreys or Paul Begalas or David Brocks of the world who ought to be embarrassed by this whole sad spectacle. After all, these people are well compensated for their ability to enlarge the Cult of Clinton. Really, the people who ought to be embarrassed is us – America. Thus far the evidence would suggest that the Clintons are flat incapable of losing a general election, and it would further suggest that if the general election were held today, Hillary would mop the floor with any of the current Republican frontrunners.

It is my firm belief that anthropologists who study this period of American history will look upon our collective 30 year fascination with these crooked frauds with the same sense of amazed disgust that normal people have when they think about Jonestown or the Branch Dividians. How, we think to ourselves, could so many otherwise rational people allow themselves to be duped by such obviously crooked and self-involved leaders to the point that they surrendered all their possessions (including their spouses) to the whims of these cult leaders?

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As with all these tragic stories, there comes a critical point where the followers must make a choice to follow their leaders into oblivion or to return to normalcy – shaken and embarrassed, maybe, but hopefully still able to function as regular members of society. As we head into 2016, we face just such a decision point as a society: will we be able to shake the powerful and entrancing influence of the Clintons and their silver-tongued priests, or will we complete the suicide pact which was set in motion some 24 years ago?

Only time will tell. But if nothing else, this latest scandal has reminded us that, above all things, Hillary is still a Clinton, and the Clintons are still the Clintons. If we are entranced, it will have happened with our eyes wide open.

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