Canada Moves to Make Their Anthem Gender Neutral...World Breathes Collective Sigh of Relief

Famine. Nuclear threats. Sexual assault. Genocide. Regional warfare around the globe. A Spice Girls reunion.

These are just a few of the most pressing issues of our time. Our neighbors to the north may not have figured out how to solve any of those problems, but that doesn’t mean they’re not hard at work in the justice arena.


Sure, people need to eat and not be murdered, but more importantly people need to be free from the oppression of the patriarchal language of the national anthem. To that end, and in keeping with the feminist philosophy of flannel-onesie-come-to-life Prime Minister Justin Trudeau the Canadian senate has voted to make their national anthem more gender neutral.

The line “True patriot love, in all thy sons command” has been changed to “in all of us command”. 

Canadians took to twitter to voice their opinions. While some applauded the changes, many Canadians said they couldn’t have cared less about the words and felt the change was a waste of time.




Clearly (and unsurprisingly) there were some politics involved.


But not everyone was that concerned either way.

Whelp. That’s done. Now Canada can get back to the very important business of being the second best country in North America. It’s a moderately taxing job, but somebody has to do it.


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