Greetings from the sports desk located somewhere below decks of the Good Pirate Ship RedState. Sammy the Shark and Karl the Kraken are sleeping off a fish cracker binge, so you’re stuck with me doing all the writing.

March Madness isn’t strictly for college basketball anymore, as the month that often comes in like a lion and goes out like a lamb is also the month where lions turn into rams. More specifically, free agent offensive lineman Jonah Jackson has left the Detroit Lions for the Los Angeles Rams. This is but one of the veritable plethora of roster moves across the NFL free agent landscape, a few highlights of which we shall … um, highlight.

Russell Wilson, for whom the Denver Broncos backed up the draft picks truck two years ago and deposited multiple selections on the Seattle Seahawks’ lawn, has been cut loose by the Broncos and is making his way to Pittsburgh and an upcoming agreement with the Steelers. Whether this means Wilson’s role is the proverbial steadying influence/veteran backup for Kenny Pickett or as Pickett’s replacement remains undetermined.

The Minshew Mania Revue is on its way to Sin City, as the Las Vegas Raiders have signed Gardner Minshew II, while releasing Jimmy Garoppolo. Minshew is usually serviceable, but there is a reason why he’s played for multiple teams in his career, and it’s not because he has an advanced case of wanderlust. Meanwhile, the Indianapolis Colts, for whom Minshew played a lot in 2023 after Anthony Richardson went down, have signed Joe Flacco as the (everybody say it with me) proverbial steadying influence/veteran backup.

Finishing up with the quarterback shuffle, Kirk Cousins has bid adieu to the Minnesota Vikings and their domed stadium to join the Atlanta Falcons in their domed stadium. The man may never get a decent tan. Whether the Falcons can raise themselves to be a decent team around Cousins remains to be seen. Meanwhile, back at the swamp, the Washington Redskins Football Team Commanders have traded Sam Howell to the Seattle Seahawks, and will presumably draft a quarterback with their number two selection come April 25 in Detroit Rock City. The Commanders have also signed Marcus Mariota as the (One. More. TIME!) proverbial steadying influence/veteran backup for whichever rookie they pick.

The Tampa Bay Buccaneers have re-signed Baker Mayfield, who got them to the playoffs last season. At the same time, the New England Patriots have traded Mac Jones, who didn’t get them to the playoffs in 2023, to the Jacksonville Jaguars, as backup in case Trevor Lawrence pulls a neck muscle while shampooing. Fear not, Patriot fans, for you have a freshly acquired quarterback in the presence of Jacoby Brissett … on second thought, start fearing. It's the same deal for Vikings fans facing the prospect of starting the upcoming season with Sam Darnold under center.

Turning attention to the running back position, a couple of high-profile veterans have officially joined the Something To Prove Club. Saquon Barkley has escaped from New York, or at least the New York Giants, to sign with the Philadelphia Eagles. Meanwhile, Derrick Henry has done his best Chris Stapleton impersonation by saying so long to the Tennessee Titans, in favor of joining forces with Lamar Jackson and the Baltimore Ravens.

One of the best signings came from within, as the Indianapolis Colts reupped wide receiver Michael Pittman. The Colts and Los Angeles Rams have followed a path of signings that, be it external or keeping what you already have, features establishing depth over dazzle. It may not be splashy or make for great sports radio fodder, but as we saw last season with the New York Jets and Aaron Rodgers, high profile brings an inherent danger of falling from great heights when things go wrong.

Next up on the sports calendar, it’s college basketball tournament time.