Comedian Hilariously Demonstrates How We're Not "All in the Same Boat" During Shutdown

Credit: Screenshot

On Saturday Patton Oswalt was the latest celebrity to completely dismiss what average Americans are experiencing during our collective quarantine, assuming that everyone has the luxury to sit home, order food from Door Dash/Postmates/Uber Eats, watch Netflix, and play video games. Brian Stelter attempted to identify with “the struggle” by admitting that he finally allowed himself to mourn his former life.


The tweets are bad enough; celebrity quarantine videos assuring us that “we’re all in this together” are even worse. All “celebrity” blue checks should be forced to watch this video from comedian Tim Dillon before they’re allowed to post their own quarantine video (Language warning):

We don’t want to hear celebrities telling us how we should feel or what we should do during the shutdown. They’re not medical doctors, they’re not economists, they’re not therapists, and now we know that they look just like us when they don’t have hairstylists, makeup artists, and cameramen who know how to get just the right angle and lighting.

What celebrities are experiencing right now is not what we are experiencing. As someone wrote on Facebook recently, we’re all riding out the same storm, but we’re not riding it out in the same boat. Normally I wouldn’t share one of those copy/paste Facebook thingies (technical term), but I’m making an exception for this because it’s spot-on:

I heard that we are all in the same boat, but it’s not like that. We are in the same storm, but not in the same boat. Your ship could be shipwrecked and mine might not be. Or vice versa.


For some, quarantine is optimal. A moment of reflection, of re-connection, easy in flip flops, with a cocktail or coffee. For others, this is a desperate financial & family crisis.

For some that live alone they’re facing endless loneliness. While for others it is peace, rest & time with their mother, father, sons & daughters.

With the $600 weekly increase in unemployment some are bringing in more money to their households than they were working. Others are working more hours for less money due to pay cuts or loss in sales.

Some families of 4 just received $3400 from the stimulus while other families of 4 saw $0.

Some were concerned about getting a certain candy for Easter while others were concerned if there would be enough bread, milk and eggs for the weekend.

Some want to go back to work because they don’t qualify for unemployment and are running out of money. Others want to kill those who break the quarantine.

Some are home spending 2-3 hours/day helping their child with online schooling while others are spending 2-3 hours/day to educate their children on top of a 10-12 hour workday.

Some have experienced the near death of the virus, some have already lost someone from it and some are not sure if their loved ones are going to make it. Others don’t believe this is a big deal.

Some have faith in God and expect miracles during this 2020. Others say the worst is yet to come.

So, friends, we are not in the same boat. We are going through a time when our perceptions and needs are completely different.

Each of us will emerge, in our own way, from this storm. It is very important to see beyond what is seen at first glance. Not just looking, actually seeing.

We are all on different ships during this storm experiencing a very different journey.

Celebrities, we know you have the best of intentions (at least some of you), but have just been so disconnected from real life for so long that you truly have no idea what you’re talking about here. We’re here for your efforts to entertain during this time, but please cut the advice and “we’re all in the same boat” bits from your script.



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