Obviously, in this political environment, there’s a demand for authenticity, so we figured we’d give the voters what they want and put on display the real, authentic Donald Trump: A creepy old man who, apparently, would totally be up for screwing his kid if only 50 percent of her DNA weren’t his, and a guy who’s padded out his inherited fortune by screwing average working people like those he’s begging to vote for him, financially, on a regular basis for decades now.

Donald Trump says a lot of stupid stuff.

In 2006, he said on The View, “if Ivanka weren’t my daughter, perhaps I’d be dating her.”

He told Rolling Stone that if he weren’t happily married and his daughter’s father, he’d… well, he didn’t finish the thought, but you can guess what he meant.

Here’s some other stupid stuff Trump has said.

Trump thinks Americans get paid too much.

Trump said in a debate, “Wages [are] too high… we’re not going to be able to compete against the world.”

Trump complains about the influx of foreign workers and claims negative effects from immigration.

But he admitted to CNN that he hires foreigners at his swanky Palm Beach resort, not Americans because “American people, they want full-time jobs.”

Trump supports eminent domain– using government power to take ordinary people’s property so people like him can make more money.

Trump said “I think eminent domain is wonderful.”

Trump.

Stupid Stuff.

Make the smart choice, and support Ted Cruz.

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• In 2006, he said on The View, “if Ivanka weren’t my daughter, perhaps I’d be dating her.” (Donald Trump on The View, 2006)
• Donald Trump to Rolling Stone: “After I met Ivanka and praised her to her father, he said, ‘Yeah, she’s really something, and what a beauty, that one. If I weren’t happily married and, ya know, her father . . . ‘” (Donald Trump to Rolling Stone, 2015)
• Trump said in a debate, “Wages [are] too high… we’re not going to be able to compete against the world.” (Donald Trump, Fox News Republican Presidential Debate, 2015)
• Trump complains about the influx of foreign workers and claims negative effects from illegal immigration. (Donald Trump presidential website)
• Trump to CNN: “American people, they want full-time jobs.” (Donald Trump on CNN, 2016)
• Trump said “I think eminent domain is wonderful.” (Donald Trump to Fox’s Bret Baier, 2015)