It has been a puzzling week for The Apple Network, while everyone else just laughs.

CNN has meant a lot of things to the journalism landscape. Sure, accuracy has not been one of those things, but they still manage to influence. One fashion they have impacted the news of late has been in the self-anointed role of media accuracy police. In the Donald Trump era CNN has felt the need to become the arbiter of what is factual and truthful.

Actually adhering to this fact-based standard has been beyond the network’s skill set.

The primary method of dispensing its brand of accountability has come in the form of the network’s own media analyst, Brian Stelter, and his understudy Oliver Darcy. When it comes to a pair of media watchdogs though CNN has selected not a set of professionally-trained mastiffs but a duo who are more akin to a pair of lapdog Yorkies with distemper. The Stelter-Darcy comedy team is very intent on holding the likes of Fox News responsible for supposed ethical infractions. Other networks — and especially CNN itself — garner no such introspection.

A prime example of this came through the email transom overnight. Darcy, filling in as protege’, composed the daily Reliable Sources newsletter, delivering what he proclaimed was Friday’s “big stories”. Amid pieces on the argument over a possible recession in the press, the feud between Dan Crenshaw and some unknown twit at Young Turks, and mention of Taylor Swift’s new album release (thankfully she is getting some exposure, as this is a Big Story!) there were some omissions by Oliver.

Understand now that CNN has been leading the narrative about the supposed threats to journalists regarding the administration. They have declared that any stifling of news gathering and the practice of journalism is a threat to our democracy. Yet somehow Oliver & Company have been remarkably mute about their co-worker April Ryan mired in a lawsuit (covered previously by Sister Toljah) as a result of her own bodyguard shutting down another journalist at a speaking event where she appeared.

This was hardly supposition. There is the journalist himself coming forward with details. There is video footage of this transpiring. There is a lawsuit. What there is not is any recognition of the violation of journalistic practice from the B & O Railroaders, Stelter & Darcy. I guess this is not considered as big of a media story as the WWE starting its own podcasts!

Another big news item from the Hall Monitors, of course, was the announcement of Sarah Sanders joining Fox news. This was the second-most outlandish media announcement of the week, according to Stelter, and Darcy provided some very stern words from his mentor while going over the FIRST-most outlandish story of the week:

Last night, while writing about Sean Spicer’s gig on “Dancing (With The Stars),” Stelter raised a question: How should former W.H. officials who consistently misled the public be treated when they seek positions of fame and privilege? Given Sanders’ new role, the question is more relevant than ever.

Is that a relevant question, Oliver? Then here is a question as follow up: Why was this same question not being asked by you, nor Mr. Stelter regarding your network hiring of disgraced former FBI Official Brian McCabe? I mean, if the outrage is over “misleading the public” then how is your network hiring a man who was fired over leaks and lying on the stand? How is it that when the exact – same – thing takes place under your roof there is ZERO comment to be made?!

Look, we get it — Sean Spicer appearing on a dancing reality program is the biggest threat to the underpinnings of our democracy. Understood. But in your coverage of the “Big Stories” you could not manage to find space between Spider-Man leaving Marvel, and details from the D23 Disney convention to make mention of your channel hiring a former official who perjured himself before a congressional committee?

Oh, wait for a moment, I stand corrected. I now see that the reason is that the hiring of Brian McCabe is not a “Big Story”; it is merely “some news”, according to the CNN media guard-Corgi.

Some news: CNN announces Andrew McCabe has been signed as a contributor.

— Oliver Darcy (@oliverdarcy) August 23, 2019

So we should not be overly concerned with these details. Who appears on a dancing reality show is far more important to fret over, says the network being bested by Sponge Bob on a nightly basis.

Stelter says the Spicer/Sanders TV gigs "deserve outrage and backlash." pic.twitter.com/QrI9npSL5V

— Cameron Cawthorne (@Cam_Cawthorne) August 22, 2019