Get Royally Informed: Monarch Mania in Seven Minutes or Less

It’s expected that as many as 4 billion viewers will watch the funeral of Queen Elizabeth II on Monday.

Are you Royal-curious? Have a slight interest, but don’t want to slog through the 25 articles a day at Daily Mail and the Guardian just to find out what’s going on? We’ve got you covered. Here’s a CliffsNotes version of Royal goings-on so that you can know it all in just a few minutes. No, we won’t cover every perceived slight by Meghan Markle, or each meaningful glance between Harry and William, but we’ll give you the basics.

First things first: Queen Elizabeth died a little over a week ago after her reign as the longest-serving monarch in the history of the British Empire. Think you know her? You probably don’t, unless you’re a Royal obsessive. Read this truly fascinating obituary of the woman who witnessed or participated in virtually every important global event since World War II. I guarantee you will discover things you did not know.

A lot has gone on since then. The most obvious: the man known as Prince Charles my entire life is now “King Charles III.” It takes a little getting used to. Not only did he become king, but he also inherited $21 billion and is now one of the richest men in the world.

On Monday, Princess Anne made history by being the first woman royal to participate in the Vigil of the Princes. On Friday, the vigils continued, followed by one from the royal grandchildren on Saturday. The Daily Mail reports on Friday’s Vigil of the Children:

As tearful mourners watched on, the Queen’s four children stood guard of their mother’s coffin for more than 10 minutes at Westminster Hall this evening. The siblings each guarded a side of the coffin, with Charles, dressed in a Navy Admiral uniform, standing at the head.

It was their second, and final, vigil for the beloved monarch. Known as the ‘Vigil of the Children’ – an honor dating back to the time of George V – it mirrors a previous event held earlier this week at St Giles’ Cathedral in Edinburgh.


The question was, what to do with Prince Andrew, otherwise known as the Duke of York, who was caught up in the Jeffrey Epstein saga and has mostly been removed from royal life? In the end, he was given special dispensation to wear the full military dress uniform of a Vice Admiral of the Navy. Unfortunately for him, rumor has it that once the Queen is buried, Andrew will be even further shoved into the shadows.

This week’s Prince Harry drama swirled around whether or not he would also be able to wear his military uniform to the Saturday vigil. In a last-minute reversal, it was decided by the powers-that-be that he too be given permission to wear his army colors for the Vigil of the Grandchildren in Westminster Hall:

All this is going on while the Queen lies in state at Westminster. If you think nobody cares about the Royal Family any more, note that the line to see her had at one point stretched to 5 miles long with 24-hour wait times. That’s dedication, folks. Soccer star David Beckham reportedly waited 13 hours for his turn. His thoughts:

Because we can all see with the love that has been shown, how special she is and how special she was and the legacy that she leaves behind… It’s a sad day, but it’s a day for us to remember the incredible legacy that she’s left.

The day was not without drama, however, as a man inexplicably stunned mourners by attempting to grab the Queen’s coffin. Officers tackled the man and arrested him, but not until after he’d injured a 7-year-old girl.

No Royal Roundup would be complete, however, without discussing the latest disruptive behavior from the Queen-in-Her-Own-Mind Meghan Markle and her husband Prince Harry, whose children Archie and Lillibet are now bequeathed the titles of Prince and Princess. Of course, that’s not enough for the pair, who are reportedly “furious” that their kids won’t get the coveted HRH (His/Her Your Royal Highness) designations. Even though they left active Royal duty in the “Megxit” spectacle, they still expect that these titles should be doled out like candy.

The feuding brothers appeared to patch up their differences briefly on Wednesday, as they walked together behind the Queen’s coffin, bringing up memories of when they did the same 25 years ago at Princess Diana’s funeral procession.


Of course, don’t expect this to be the end of the duo who left Britain to seek privacy, since Harry still is contracted to issue a tell-all book sometime next year, possibly with allegations of racism against the Family. That should go well.

The number of world leaders streaming into London for Monday’s funeral is extensive, and most will be carpooling to the service. The armored limo known as The Beast will convey US President Joe Biden, who landed in London Saturday night and will meet privately with King Charles on Sunday to pay his respects. The invitation list has set off diplomatic scuffles, as one might imagine.

The Queen’s funeral is expected to be one of the most watched television shows on the planet with possibly as many as 4 billion viewers anticipated. Although the New York Times has taken this opportunity to wage a one-newspaper “jihad” against the Royal Family, it would seem that many people around the world are still fascinated with the monarchy, despite its many flaws. To watch the solemnities from the United States, you’ll have to get up very early or stay up very late; coverage will begin Monday at 4:00 am Eastern.

There you have it. You’ve been royally informed in just a few minutes.

Update: this article was updated Sunday to clarify that the Queen died over a week ago.


Trending on RedState Videos