A Terrorist Is dead and a Dog Breaks the Internet: Are We Doomed?

Conan the Dog as tweeted by President Trump

Welcome to Are We Doomed? the weekly column in which I will take the latest news and try to determine if it’s all downhill from here.

Bye-Bye Baghdadi

Good news, everybody, a major terrorist is super dead!


Verdict: Not doomed!


Excuse Me?

Instead of celebrating a huge blow to terrorism, some news outlets were a little confused. The Washington Post put his death in the obituary section rather than news, and the headline described Baghdadi as “an austere religious scholar at the helm of  Islamic State.” They then went on to describe a man who nobody thought was prone to violence, a little kid with poor vision who loved soccer. They certainly tried to paint him in as sympathetic a light as possible.

They did change it after it went viral, but why would it happen in the first place?

Verdict: Pretty doomed until and unless these once-respected media outlets get their collective act together.


The information came out in drips. A hero dog was on the team that took out Baghdadi. The dog was injured, but ok. Then we found out the hero dog is a good girl named Conan. A picture was released and she’s a beautiful Belgian Malionis.


Verdict: Dogs are everything. We are not doomed as long as we have them.

The next day, the Daily Wire tweeted a meme. A photoshopped image of President Trump putting the medal of honor on Conan. The president retweeted it, showing his love for her. And that’s when people lost their dang minds.

But then…

People fact-checked the image, checked with Trump’s schedule to see if he was scheduled to present a medal to a dog that day, and went ballistic over the president tweeting “misinformation.” Have these people never seen a meme? Look at  this nonsense.

The New York Times even found the human who was replaced by Conan in the photoshop to get his comment. He thought it was funny, because he’s a normal person.


Verdict: As with the story above, old-school media is completely doomed, as is anyone who lacks a sense of humor enough to get mad about this. So, partial doom.


After the bizarre response, the memes got even better.

Verdict: The people taking this seriously were so soundly mocked that it gave me hope for the future.


Girl, that is creepy. He’s not God, he’s a politician.

Verdict: We are definitely doomed as long as people are looking to a politician to find their own worth. Yikes.


Kanye Drops a New Album

Kanye West dropped a new album called “Jesus is King” and people were…surprised. It’s an album of Biblically-sound music worshiping God.

He promoted the new album in his own version of Carpool Karaoke with James Corden, and it was so good.

Verdict: It’s incredible to see people making positive changes. Some doubt that he’s a true believer, but how are we to know and who are we to say? He got the phrase “Jesus is King” trending on Twitter, and who knows how many people will hear a message in his music they hadn’t heard before, or hadn’t heard in a way that spoke to them? I think it’s worth being excited about.

Verdict: We’re not doomed. At all.


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