Germany's New Lunatic Heat Tips: Ban AC, Suffer In the Dark

Remember when Germany was a great power? Or, at least, when they weren't driven completely daffy by the demands of their own version of the woke left, which would presumably be the woke linke? Well, it's been a while since then. Now, in the latest illustration of Deutschland überall verrückt, the country that once gave rise to a hero like Arminius is now, in the face of a heat wave that wouldn't be noticed in St. Louis or Indianapolis, telling its citizens to remain indoors, unplug everything, pull the blinds, and suffer in the dark. The Daily Sceptic's Eugyppius, writing from Germany, has more.

It is literally 30 degrees Celsius (86 degrees Fahrenheit) as I type this, and if you were an alien from Pluto listening to central German radio you’d have to conclude that these temperatures are at the very limits of human survivability. (It’s substantially warmer further west, but the hysteria is the same everywhere.) Meteorologists are running short of death doom colours to depict the dire state of our temperature emergency:

86 degrees? Sorry, no "30 degrees Celsius" here; this is America, we use good old F for Freedom degrees. And 86? Seriously? I've seen it come within two degrees of that here, where I live, in Alaska. Yes, in Alaska. It's not common, but it happens.

Instead of telling people to stop whining and mach schon, the German "public health authorities" are issuing some advice to keep Germans from melting like a butter sculpture.

And former Covid Minister Karl Lauterbach has declared that “many people will die” and denounced “Right-wing conspiracy theorists” for not taking sunny summer weather seriously enough.
Meanwhile, in what has become a fixed seasonal ritual, German public health authorities and state media have begun circulating lunatic emergency advice for how to stay cool in this life-threatening heat situation.
Their pointers:
Open windows only at night, early in the morning, and late in the evening.
Otherwise close all windows and draw all curtains so you can be both uncomfortably warm and profoundly depressed.
Safely ensconced in your stuffy dark apartment, unplug all electrical devices, including your internet router, because these can emit heat even in “standby mode”.
Also roll up all of your carpets to stop them from storing heat.
Hang up wet laundry in your dark apartment to cool the air via evaporation, but do not hang up too much wet laundry or the air will become excessively humid, which is even worse.

Sorry, but that's just pathetic. What happened to you, Germany? Did you lose your national klöten?

Pentagon Official Says Ranks in Jihadist Groups on the Rise Because...Climate Change?

I've spent some time in Germany, in Uncle Sam's colors. My experiences there, in 1996 and 1997, were great. I thought Germany was a great place, with great food, great beer, lots of lovely frauleins, and friendly people, at least in Bavaria. My wife and I went back once, for a long weekend, in 2018, and had a good time - but boy, you could tell some things had changed. But we wouldn't have expected this.

How did Germans get along in warm summers before there were "former Covid Ministers" to tell them how to cope? It's a mystery.

This seems appropriate.

Editor’s Note: Thanks to President Trump’s leadership and bold policies, America’s economy is back on track.

Help us continue to report on the president’s economic successes and combat the lies of the Democrats. Join RedState VIP and use promo code FIGHT to receive 60% off your membership.