It is belaboring the obvious to note that one shouldn't rush into major, life-changing decisions. But these days, it seems like the immediate gratification culture has led to precisely this. Advocates can and do drive these decisions, and never is that more apparent than when it comes to the "gender-affirming care" issue, where many troubled people — including minors — are not receiving counseling so much as advocacy and are being so pressured to opt for medical treatments that are life-changing and irreversible. Some of them go back, a process called "de-transitioning."

Tiger Reed is one of these "de-transitioners," who has been living as a man for 13 years and now realizes she was sold a bill of goods — and is going back. Her story is an interesting and compelling one.

My name is Tiger Reed. I am a 44-year-old librarian in St. Louis, Missouri. Since 2016, I have been married to Jamie Reed. She is the whistleblower who exposed the alarming effects of “gender-affirming” medical care given to minors at the Washington University Transgender Center at St. Louis Children’s Hospital in a 2023 article for The Free Press. Her story shocked the nation. I am also “Dad” to the five children we are raising together—two from Jamie’s previous marriage and three we have adopted.

And now, after 13 years of living as a man, I am in the process of tapering down my weekly testosterone injections to begin the process of becoming a woman again. 

Note that there are none of the issues frequently discussed in the "transgender" debate. Tiger was a woman opting to appear as a man; there are no issues with women's athletics here, and Tiger decided to transition as an adult. That's quite a different ethical kettle of fish than advocates pushing gender-affirming care on children, or the horrendously unfair practice of allowing boys and men to play on girls' and women's sports teams. None of those issues apply here — but that doesn't mean that Tiger Reed made the decision in a vacuum, nor did she make the decision to de-transition in a vacuum. In fact, her reason for the latter decision is interesting indeed.

When Jamie exposed the harm gender-affirming care does to vulnerable children and teens, many with a history of trauma and various mental health diagnoses, she was widely attacked by activists. That Jamie was married to me, a trans man, was powerful evidence she was no transphobe.

But looking back, I realize the thing that threatened me the most about Jamie going public was something I didn’t want to face. This was the knowledge that my spouse and a growing chorus of knowledgeable critics were right. They were right that there was something fundamentally amiss with the message, especially to young people, that a swift gender transition was a safe, all-purpose solution to profound problems.

Yes, there is something fundamentally wrong; the treatment of gender dysphoria, which for decades was a) very rare and b) generally treated with therapy, not medical intervention, has been taken over by advocates. That the number of people, children and adults, seeking gender-affirming care is exploding is almost certainly a reflection of this. Whereas gender dysphoria was once a rare but generally accepted psychological syndrome that was generally resolved with therapy, it has become a social contagion, one pushed by legions of advocates — and people like Tiger Reed are the ones paying the price for this.

See Related: 'Transfixed': Riley Gaines Premieres New Mini-Series Detailing Manipulation of 'Transgender' Kids

The Story of a Man’s Struggle With Gender Identity and Why He Believes ‘Affirmation’ Is Dangerous

Tiger's story is a compelling one — a young person, troubled, with addicted, abusive parents and virtually no support system. This is a recipe for a young person ready to be taken in by any charlatan promising a quick fix, which is what Tiger was promised, and which did not develop. And, what's more, Tiger — who will be changing her name back to her birth name, Roxxanne — will never be able to fully restore what she was convinced to give up.

For detransitioners, there is no clear path. Gender-affirming clinicians have been ignoring and dismissing our concerns. While my transition was covered by insurance, my detransition is not. To restore my hairline and remove my body hair will cost me thousands. In the next few years I may have breast reconstructive surgery. There are many questions I don’t have the answers to—such as whether my kids, now ranging in age from two to 16 years old, should still call me “Dad.” I am planning to change my name back to Roxxanne, and to change my license so it says “female” again. But I wonder if I’ll ever pass as a woman.

That last sentence is heartbreaking. She's likely right; the effects of the hormone treatments, not to mention the mastectomy, can never be completely reversed or repaired.

Still, Tiger — Roxxanne — appears to have thought this through. She may not have thought the original decision through; she may have been persuaded by advocates for the gender-affirming hooraw, but she seems to have her feet more firmly on the ground now.

And there is a warning here in Roxxanne Reed's story. It's a sad story of a troubled young person seemingly taken in by charlatans who promised her a quick fix for a lifetime of troubles. That quick fix didn't work. For coming forward with this, she will draw the ire of the "transgender" advocates, but she seems prepared to deal with it — as her spouse already has been.

Tiger — Roxxanne — is advocating now for alternatives, including that young people, in particular, should be aware that there are alternatives to life-altering, permanent hormone treatments and surgeries. We should offer her our sympathy for what was done to her. Her story is a cautionary tale, and she should be applauded for coming forward with it.