Democrats, Three Types of Trump Voters, and How to Get Everybody Mad at Me, at Once

I’ve been on the tip of the spear for this entire election cycle, it seems. I have seen a lot, and none of it is like anything I’ve ever experienced, or thought I would in this lifetime.

To say I am flabbergasted, flummoxed, and in a whole, new realm of disbelief (and disgust) would be an understatement.

For starters, there is no sane reason for Hillary Clinton to be running for president. She has more than proven herself to be unqualified and unfit.

Her existence as a candidate proves, without any shadow or shade of doubt, that to be a Democrat is to embrace corruption.

I didn’t need that reminder. The Democrats have a long history of supporting the ungodly, unprincipled, and completely vile. From Jim Crow laws to abortion, Democrats have always been on the wrong side of decent humanity.

In fact, my usual response when meeting the average Democrat is to mentally recoil and think, “So who’d you stab in the head with a screwdriver today?”

That’s not to say that I haven’t gotten to know quite a few Democrats who are reasonable and pleasant enough. I just have to really question the root of their moral fiber.

These people voted for Barack Obama, after all.

This year really has been an eye-opener for me, however. I have had to face some uncomfortable truths.

While the left and the Democrat party are full of reprobates, the Republican party has done its part to usher in a new level of breathtaking incompetence and corruption.

With wide eyes and a tired spirit, I have been forced to watch Donald Trump dismantle every carefully placed brick of good will and commonsense governance of the Republican party.

Somewhere, Goldwater, Reagan, and Buckley are weeping.

Having been so out front with this fight from the beginning, I’ve made my observations, and I’ve found that there are three, distinct varieties of Trump voters. Let’s examine them all.

  • Political hostages. These are your reluctant Trump voters. They’ve almost always voted conservatively, or at least along party lines. They may be as disgusted with Trump as nominee as us sane folks, but they don’t see a way out. The choice is binary – Trump or Hillary. Hanging or drowning. We have two parties in this nation (in their estimation) and there must never be any straying from that rigid set. The very idea that they break from the party line and reject both unacceptable candidates is far too intimidating, so the party becomes their chains. They may grumble, or they may mewl in protest, but they support Trump as nominee, because they fear a Clinton presidency more.
  • Branch Trumpidians, Trumplings, Trumpkins. #MAGA! #TrumpTrain! #MakeAmericaGreatAgain!! These are your alt-right (or alt-reich) racists, scumbags, and glassy-eyed dolts. There is no talking to these people. At the very least, you can have a conversation with a hostage, and can even understand their white-knuckled clinging to the party banner. At least they’re not obnoxious about it.


Except for Mark Levin. He’s obnoxious about it.


The Branch Trumpidians (or if you prefer, Trumplings or Trumpkins) are a true cult. They have made a messianic figure out of Donald Trump. They write songs for him that will make you cringe so hard, your skin peels. They create these memes of his 70-year old head on a muscular, young body, riding on an eagle, holding the American flag high. For those of us who haven’t been recently lobotomized, this usually inspires teary-eyed, uncontrollable laughter. Then we throw up.

These are also the very dangerous people who are threatening to wreak havoc in our streets if their god is not enthroned in the White House on November 8. He has spent months whipping them into a frenzy over “rigged” elections, a corrupt media (the same media that gave him billions in free ad time, through the primaries), and the party that embraced him is actually the enemy. If our political system is a sewer, these are what has bobbed up to the surface. And they stink.

  • Spectators. These are the people who only really become cognizant of our political system when they start getting all the campaign flyers in their mailboxes. They have no curiosity about the process. They know the new iPhone. They know what Kim and Kanye wore to the Grammy Awards. They cannot tell you the three branches of government or their functions. They don’t listen to news, read news, or care about news. If it can’t be fit on a bumper sticker, it’s too much information to process.

These are the people who know Trump from either his Howard Stern appearances, his WWE appearances, or reality TV. They think the idea that he’s running for president is a real hoot! They’re going to vote for him because they think it would be so funny if he actually won! They would vote for Honey Boo Boo and Mama June, if they were on the ballot.

And here we are.

Our Constitutional republic is being replaced by an idiocracy. We are seeing our society go through de-evolution, and the rest of the world is laughing at us.

Both the Democrats and Republicans are responsible for this.

A true revolution is in order, but it had better happen fast. The lunatics have been given the keys of freedom and democracy, and they are about to drive this nation over a very high cliff.

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