Though I wasn't deluding myself about my dad's condition and the toll caring for him was taking on mom, me going back to my house at the end of staying at their house for five or six days at a time was my way of "escaping" it for a little while, my way of preserving some sense of normalcy at a time when things were getting increasingly chaotic.

SEE ALSO -->> Caregiver's Diary Part 24: The Bird Feeders

I had also made the decision early that year to sign up with a realtor and begin the process of getting my house ready to put on the market. After living so many years in a two-story home that had a few steps just to get into the house, I wanted a ranch home that would be more suitable for family gatherings since my dad couldn't do stairs anymore, and they were starting to become trouble for my mom.

But just two months after I connected with a realtor, my dad suffered a fall while coming out of the master bathroom. It was a day my dad had been through dialysis treatment and was weaker than normal. Mom had texted me in a panic and told me she'd called the fire department so they could help him get up, and that he was adamant that he was not going to the hospital.

After the fire department arrived and got him up and sitting on the bed, they asked him if he could get off the bed on his own. 

He couldn't.

That meant he'd have to go to the hospital, where we knew what would happen based on past experiences: They'd run tests, then tell us they weren't a rehab center, and that they'd make some recommendations to us for places Dad could go to hopefully get his leg strength back.

That day ended up being the last day Dad ever set foot in his and Mom's house. And the night before that was the last one I ever slept in mine, because I was uncomfortable with Mom staying in their house alone. I told myself that once Dad was back on his feet and able to come home that we'd resume our old routines where I would visit every other week to assist Mom with whatever she needed me to.

That never happened, though, as two months later - and one week before Father's Day, we said goodbye to my dad, who spent his final hours in a hospital and who had put in his final papers that he did not want to be put on life support.

In some ways, I feel like my dad knew that the fall he suffered that April was the beginning of the end. He told me the next day, when the hospital was evaluating him prior to letting us know he'd have to go to a physical rehab facility, that I should "make sure to take care of mom" because "she needs it more than I do."  And he was right - she was getting to the point she needed more help than she would admit to, as she was battling symptoms at the time of what we later found out to be colon cancer.

And then a week before we lost him, he told Mom that when he passed away, he wanted to be cremated so he could "get back to dust as quick as possible."

2022 was tough on my family, a year of so much change in our lives, but we got through it thanks in large part to the support and prayers of family, friends, co-workers, neighbors, medical professionals, and the online community. Thankfully, at least for the time being, we are in a better place emotionally, having just celebrated another Mother's Day with Mom. Here's to what I pray will be many more:

One thing reaffirmed over the last 3 yrs in my family is *never* take one moment for granted. Cherish every minute w/ loved ones including the 🤗 & 💋 bc you never know what life will bring. Feeling blessed on #MothersDay w/ mom. 🙏🏻ing for many more & thanking God for her. 💙 pic.twitter.com/pRsUL2qtkx

— Sister Toldjah 💙 (@sistertoldjah) May 12, 2025

READ MORE: To take a look at my previous Caregiver's Diary entries, please click here.