I Am a Scofflaw

I am a scofflaw, and my guess is so are you.

I’ve been a scofflaw all my life, it seems.

I had my first beer and cigarette when I was under the legal age decades ago, and I haven’t stopped breaking the law since.


I still drive in excess of the speed limit.

I once built a shed without a zoning permit.  It still stands.

I sprayed Round-Up on a landscaping job without a license.  Nobody got sick or died.

I mixed mortar on a construction site without a protective mask, and I built scaffolding that wasn’t OSHA approved.  No silicosis yet.

I had a dog without a license.  He was too old to bite, anyway.

I circumvented the state emissions check by unhooking the battery the day before the test.  It was my neighbor’s advice.

I earned a few dollars bartending and never reported them to the IRS.  Hardly enough to live on as it was.

I’ve bought and sold goods without charging sales tax.

I twice took a Percoset without a prescription.  Didn’t know that was a felony.

I worked for cash for less than the minimum wage.  It was one of my first jobs when I had no skills.

I lit off illegal fireworks.  C’mon, everyone does that!

I married a scofflaw, too.  What a wild child!

She admits to sampling dope, coke, acid, pills and mushrooms in her mis-spent youth.  She’s worked for cash, too.

My cousin, too, a rule-breaker.

He owns guns that the state says he shouldn’t.


My friends are scofflaws.

Smoke still smoke pot.  Some work for cash and still don’t report income.  Some perform electrical or plumbing services without a license.  One wants to build a whiskey still in his barn.

I live in a country founded by scofflaws and still run by scofflaws.

The most famous signature in American history, John Hancock, came from a family of smugglers.

Our last three Presidents, scofflaws all, are admitted illegal drug users.

The flouting of the law goes on and on–I am part of the problem, and my guess is a few RedStaters are, too.

Or perhaps, disregard of the law is a time-honored right and tradition and habit of a free people.  It’s a fine line.  Everyone decides for himself which of his own petty crimes are justifiable and what crimes his neighbor commits are forgivable.

And so, what of border-crossing scofflaws?  Do they deserve forgiveness?  Why not?  Who have they hurt?  Who have they cheated in breaking the law?  Why is border-crossing a greater sin than illegal drug use?  Or speeding?  Or tax evasion?

I don’t like the idea of a lawless society anymore than the next guy despite my checkered past and present, but why are we so eager to see the mote in the foreigner’s eye and ignore the beam in our own domestic eye?


It’s true the U.S. taxpayer cannot afford endless government services for the flood of Central Americans pouring in every year, but rather than pretending that man exists for the law, might we open our borders and shut off the spigot of services and see if that stops them from coming.

This spring, we were overrun by chipmunks digging in every garden bed and scurrying to and fro, and eating tender starts.  Remarkably, once we quit putting out bird seed, the varmints were gone.  What can we learn from this?  Maybe the answer to the immigration issue isn’t steadfast defense of “the law” so much as a wise curtailment of the welfare state….



Some Action in My Life





Join the conversation as a VIP Member

Trending on RedState Videos