So Al Sharpton wants embattled Chicago mayor Rahm Emanuel to resign – and isn’t that just a tough call? I mean, on the one hand, Emanuel has been an awful mayor. And not just generically awful, either: back in 2014 a Chicago cop shot a teenager (LaQuan McDonald) sixteen times. The cop has since been charged with first-degree murder, thanks to dash-cam footage showing the shooting; and it’s now clear that Rahm Emanuel knew about the video in question, but kept a lid on it until after his re-election.

On the other hand? It’s Al Sharpton. I won’t insult vultures by comparing the man to one; after all, vultures perform an essential service in the ecosystem, and nobody’s ever convincingly linked the species to endemic anti-Semitism.  I understand that even broken clocks are correct twice a day, but in Sharpton’s case the clock has been bisected with a chainsaw and the fragments thrown into a landfill.  All of which is a over-elaborate way of saying that if Sharpton thinks that Emanuel should resign, you should maybe worry about it if you happen to agree with him.

On the gripping hand, Hillary Clinton’s political instincts are even worse than Al Sharpton’s, and she’s all in for Rahmbo: “[Clinton’s] last public statement on Emanuel came in early December when she expressed her “confidence” in him toBloomberg News, saying, “He loves Chicago and I’m confident that he’s going to do everything he can to get to the bottom of these issues and take whatever measures are necessary to remedy them.”” …Of course she’s supporting the man. It’s exactly the sort of blind stubbornness that we’ve come to expect from the unidistinguished junior Senator from New York, and downright awful former Secretary of State. And never mind that Chicago is seething over this case, to the point where Rahm Emanuel is at an 18% approval rating*: Hillary Clinton knows what she knows and she knows that she’s supposed to play nice with the Mayor of Chicago.

Seriously, her staff probably printed that out for her. Possibly in bright colors and a huge font. If I was a truly mean person, I’d suggest that they used Comic Sans…

Moe Lane

*If you’ve ever wondered what kind of approval rating an incumbent Democrat would need to have in order to give a Republican any hope whatsoever to become the next Mayor of Chicago, well, 18% is certainly in the ballpark. Mind you, I don’t know how we’d translate that into something that’d be useful for us, either. There’s not a chance in Perdition that Emanuel’s going to get the Democratic nomination again**, after all.

**Term limits? For the mayor of Chicago? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAA!