Greetings from the sports desk located somewhere below decks of the Good Pirate Ship RedState. Sammy the Shark and Karl the Kraken are, as always, on top of things ...

On top of keeping the fish cracker company in business, that is.

Considering what went on in college football yesterday (October 5), are we sure someone didn’t play fast and loose with the calendar this year by moving Halloween up from the 31st? We start with the mother of all upsets, namely Vanderbilt — yes, that Vanderbilt, more commonly known in the SEC as the Nashville Doormats, among other less than complimentary terms — defeated the Alabama Crimson Tide 40-35. Yes, Alabama showed up at the correct stadium to play the game. No, Vanderbilt did not supplement its roster with a stealth draft of NFL players. The Commodores (and why is a landlocked school’s nickname a high naval rank?) outplayed the Crimson Tide. Certainly, there were a fair amount of elements commonly referred to as zero motivation at play; Alabama was coming off a win over Georgia and thus were understandably hard-pressed to put out maximum effort against an opponent they last lost to when Ronald Reagan was making the Oval Office great. However, as Alabama now knows, the other team practices as well.

Elsewhere among ranked teams, #4 Tennessee lost to Arkansas 19-14. #10 Michigan lost to Washington 27-17, the Huskies thereby taking some revenge for losing to the Wolverines in last season’s national championship game. #11 USC lost to Minnesota 24-17. #22 Louisville lost to SMU 34-27. Thus, you had five nationally ranked teams losing to unranked teams and one doubtless now former Top Ten team dropping its contest against a lower-ranked team as #25 Texas A&M mauled #9 Missouri 41-10. And yes, although my Cal Bears put up a surprisingly strong effort, Cam Ward and Miami were too much for Oski and company in the end, winning with a touchdown in the final minute, 39-38. Le sigh.

The baseball divisional playoffs started October 5, with the New York Mets doing what they do best. Namely, trying to kill off their entire fan base. Down 1-0 going into the top of the eighth against the Philadelphia Phillies, the Mets staged a lengthy scratch rally to the tune of five runs en route to an eventual 6-2 win. What is a scratch rally, you ask? It is one that unfolds in this fashion.

• Single
• Walk
• Single (run scores)
• Single (run scores)
• Sacrifice fly (run scores, obviously)
• Single
• Single (run scores)
• Sacrifice fly (you guessed it, run scores)

Never a dull moment with the kings of Queens.

Elsewhere, the Cleveland Indians Guardians dropped a five-spot in the bottom of the first on the Detroit Tigers, eventually winning 7-0. The New York Yankees and Kansas City Royals went back and forth all game, with the Yankees eventually prevailing 6-5. The Los Angeles Dodgers and San Diego Padres must have caught wind of what was going on in the Bronx and said, “Hey, that sounds like fun,” therefore putting on their own display of the same with the Dodgers coming out on top 7-5. To everyone’s complete lack of surprise, Shohei Ohtani homered for Los Angeles. National League is back at it today; American League resumes festivities on Monday.

Quick NFL preview: OUCH! OW! Into the medical tent with you!

Have a blessed Sunday, everyone.