PETA Wants Baseball to Replace 'Bullpen' With 'Arm Barn,' Cementing their Place in Clown World

Disguised participants enjoy the carnival procession in Ludwigshafen, Germany Sunday, Feb. 11, 2018. (Andreas Arnold/dpa via AP)

With the World Series in full swing, People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (PETA) decided it needed to dig for relevance. So they took to their Twitter account and tweeted this gem:

You know the clown that came up with this idea has neither played, nor watched baseball.

From Fox News:

The term “bullpen” has been used in baseball since the sport really took hold around the late 1800s.

In baseball, the bullpen refers to the area beyond the outfield wall where pitchers warm up. Starting pitchers can be seen warming up before games while relievers do their warmups during games as they get ready to substitute for whoever is on the mound.

Now, People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (PETA) is hoping those around the sport will reconsider using the word “bullpen.” In a release Thursday, PETA said the baseball world should substitute the word “bullpen,” which references the area where bulls are kept for slaughter.

Their suggestion? Arm Barn.

Words are meant to be evocative. Other languages do this so much better, but the English language has a few winners. “fraught,” “loquacious,” and “concise,” are a few that come to mind. There is a visual symbolism that goes with the word, “bullpen.” “Arm Barn,” simply does not cut it.

Seriously.

In terms of how we should relate to the animal world, PETA has been playing language police for a minute, with facepalm-worthy results. Back in January, PETA wanted us to stop being “specieist” and using supremacist and demeaning slurs like “chicken,” “pig,” “snake,” and “rat,” as euphemisms for human moral deficiencies.

Don’t you know you’re hurting that snake’s feelings?! Look! He’s slithering away in shame….

Three years ago, PETA wanted us to stop using verbal “microaggressions,” such as, “kill two birds with one stone,” “bring home the bacon,” and, “beat a dead horse.”

You cannot make this stuff up, but apparently PETA has done it for us.

With gas prices and inflation on the rise, and our supply-chain in crisis, “bringing home the bacon” has taken on new meaning. Those who still can, appreciate being able to do it, even at a greater expense. So, nah, I think people will hang on to these phrases. I doubt the animals really care. Save for my dogs, the other animals I interact with are usually on my plate.

Just sayin’.

PETA trafficking in linguistic gymnastics takes away from the genuinely animal-saving work they do accomplish, and the alarm bells that should be raised, like slamming Dr. Anthony “Mengele” Fauci’s NIH-funded, gain-of-function research that tortured beagles in the name of sCiEnCE.

Get back to releasing animals from laboratories, PETA. Leave baseball alone.