I'm Not Laughing About OnBeep Anymore

I thought this looked hokey yesterday. It’s like the Star Trek communicator, but bulkier. It seemed silly.

Then the kids went off into the woods yesterday with their friends. I kept yelling for them. I finally had to go out there and find them. They’re building a fort out there. It looks very tribal. At any moment I expect Lord of the Flies like behavior to pop up in the neighborhood, or at least I tell my wife that as an excuse to avoid roasting whole pigs.


Speaking of my wife, she is very anti-phone. I have visions of one day dying like Malcolm Merlin’s wife, i.e. slowly bleeding to death in a ditch filling up my wife’s voicemail with odes to love as she sews away oblivious to her phone, on vibrate and at the bottom of her purse, is ringing. I wouldn’t call the house phone because she turns those ringers off and only checks voicemail once or twice a year. That’s my job.

In any event, I now see the benefit of this little device. Clip one to the kids on pain of death should they break it and sneak one under the seat in my wife’s car. If nothing else, I’ll know where they are even if they don’t answer. That’s useful in and of itself.

Count me in, On Beep. I mock you no more.


Join the conversation as a VIP Member

Trending on RedState Videos