Welcome back to the Watercooler and the first post-election edition to cover the road to the White House. Much ink has already been spilled on the results, the meaning of it all, etc. but I can’t help myself for adding my five cents (inflation you know) on winners and losers. So here goes.

Party Time

The Republican Party was and is a clear winner. The biggest turnout ever in the Iowa caucuses and it definitely has the biggest enthusiasm compared to that other Party of Old White People.

Iowa Wins Big

Other than Cruz, Iowa was definitely the other biggest winner in my book. The media loved their hospitality, Cavuto crashed Smitty’s restaurant’s delivery phone lines, and the weather held off until the election. Iowans took their responsibility seriously in picking the right candidates that can win in the long run and didn’t squander their votes on those that they just liked. It’s an all volunteer election as revivevirtue explained to us today and the entire state delivered. Well done Iowa (and this from someone who has complained about their first in the primary status year after year).

Insiders Won Too!

Let me explain. I played with the numbers a bit today from a different perspective and found out that the real winner was Senators. Here’s how I broke down the vote percentages and delegates by category, using the Des Moines Register’s final tally:

Senators (Cruz, Rubio, Paul, Santorum): 57%; 17 Delegates

Cubans (Cruz and Rubio): 51%; 15 Delegates

Outsiders (Trump, Carson, Fiorina, Other): 35.06%, 10 Delegates

Governors (Jeb?, Kasich, Huckabee, Christie & Unlucky Gilmore) 9.01%, 1 Deleg

So while some Senators like Cruz say they are outsiders, they still work in government and thus are the real insiders and they were the biggest winners. The typical outsiders, governors, were the biggest losers. And poor Gilmore, the tally for “Others” was 119 votes/.06 Delegates and Gilmore got 12 votes/.01 Delegates. His future doesn’t look bright.

Demographics

Two Cubans, an African American and a billionaire walk into a bar. They run into two old white people. The Chairman of the DNC was asked, which group of people best represents your Party? Of course she pointed to the group of four men. She was promptly kicked out by the doorman. Isn’t it time for the media to press the DNC on why they’re lacking diversity in their Party’s candidates and why they continually lie about our Party’s diversity?

About that Coin Toss

If you haven’t heard, 3 precincts were tied and were settled with a coin toss, literally, and Clinton won all 3. What are the odds of that happening? Anyway, it’s not in the DNC rule book to settle a delegate tie using a coin toss. So far Sanders hasn’t conceded a loss and was very unhappy with 90 precincts not reporting promptly last night and now he has a legitimate reason to challenge the results. But really folks, do we want to see our democracy in action using a coin toss? Heads yes, Tails no.

Quick Hits

Amusing Headlines Up First:

ABC Reporter on Iowa Caucus: A Socialist ‘Putting a Serious Dent in the Clinton Armor’

Scarborough: Hillary Clinton Declaring Victory in Iowa Feeds Into Narrative That She Is Disingenuous

You Won’t Believe What These Two Old White Guys Had to Say About Hillary’s Humiliating Fail In Iowa

* In the People in Glass Houses Shouldn’t Throw Rocks edition, Chris Christie has unveiled his newest hit job on Rubio by calling him Bubble Boy. I’m not making this up. Based upon his girth and that he got a big fat zero delegate count last night, which resembles a bubble, me thinks this line of attack will instantaneously burst!

* I smell a possible lawsuit coming on, well except Trump himself said he’d be a loser if he didn’t win. From The Hill:

After Donald Trump’s second-place finish in the Iowa caucuses Monday night, the URL loser.com redirected to the Republican White House candidate’s Wikipedia page. The domain has been owned by systems analyst Brian Connelly since 1995, according to the Daily Beast. Connelly told the Daily Beast in 2015 that he focuses the site on whoever is making headlines — or as a trolling mechanism.

Here at the Watercooler, it’s open to everyone to comment on the stories above or opine about something that’s on your mind. The threadjack rules don’t apply here, so feel free to drop in as many comments as you want on any subject. Happy Tuesday and it’s on to New Hampshire which historically has upended the Iowa results! Caution: Rough Road Conditions Ahead.