Welcome to Are We Doomed? the weekly column in which I will take the latest news and try to determine if it’s all downhill from here.
A Dog Relay
Zeus, a pit bull from Montana, was kidnapped and taken to West Virginia. The culprit was arrested, but they were left with a problem…pit bulls aren’t allowed to fly, so they had to get Zeus home by car and that would take days. That’s days of missed work, miles on the car, money for food and someplace to stay. Fortunately, dog lovers heard about this good boy and formed a relay to get him home. 15 drivers took four days to bring Zeus nine states back to Montana- and his grateful family.
You can watch the reunion here:
Verdict: People were willing to give their time, gas money, and put a few miles on their car to bring Zeus back to his family. That makes me think we’re going to be ok.
Seriously, what is California doing? First, there’s that crazy Assembly Bill (AB5) that’s killing the gig economy. Which is…a lot of people. You can read Jennifer Van Laar’s in-depth explanation of it here but, basically, in trying to hurt ride-sharing companies, they’ve hurt millions of people by restricting their ability to work.
People are fleeing the state, and they’re doing their best to make sure that continues.
Verdict: California is doomed and, if people keep leaving California for greener pastures and then voting for the very things that doomed their home state, they’re dooming the rest of us. So, we’d really appreciate it if they could stop doing that.
Here’s a guy who is getting married to a sex doll. A sex doll that has had plastic surgery because she was insecure about her looks.
Verdict: People are avoiding actual connection with other humans to this degree? We are completely doomed.
A Good Guy With a Gun
At a church service in Texas, a bad guy with a gun intended to do bad things. And he did. Fortunately, a good guy with a gun stopped him with an extraordinary shot before this became a mass shooting, and other parishioners had also drawn their firearms, ready to protect their fellow worshipers if necessary. You can read the whole story here, but you’ve likely heard it already.
Verdict: We live in a time, in a country, and in a world in which people are coming into houses of worship intending to murder people. Fortunately, people also come to the same houses of worship ready to defend others so that they may worship freely and safely. Are we doomed? Only if we aren’t celebrating those who would protect others and doing everything we can to ensure they can do so in every community while doing what we can to prevent it from being necessary.
You Can Wear a Farm!
Have you ever wanted to be a portable farm? Nor have I! Nonetheless, that non-dream can come true.
Some rando has created a “cloak” that can grow crops. It weighs 20 pounds and it smells bad. It was created in case the world is destroyed which, honestly, might be better than having to wear a farm that is powered by the wearer’s own urine. Just something to think about.
Aroussiak Gabrielian says she was inspired to create what is believed to be the world's first wearable farm after seeing what her body could provide for her newborn.
She says each cloak, watered by your own urine, can grow up to 22 crops.https://t.co/InTYVP36MV
— CBC Radio (@cbcradio) December 27, 2019
Verdict: I don’t know about you, but I’m not wearing a pee farm. I’m just not.
2020 isn’t looking great, folks, but the year is young. At least we’re not doomed yet.