You know you’ve asked it: What would it be like if a burger had cookie crumbs?
And what if those were covered in Mickey D’s special sauce?
MmmMmm, good.
And then what if the whole thing was fattened up with delicious meat?
Except…questionable meat?
And…maybe not delicious?
Let’s face it: You’ve been jonesin’ for it, and the world’s most triumphant king of cheeseburgers has royally done you right.
Hence, this week, Ronald McDonald’s crew is serving up the chain’s new Spam and Oreo burger.
You deserve a break today.
Behold, the MCDONALD'S SPAM and OREO sandwich:https://t.co/8uldiFR5xn pic.twitter.com/OCrY0ZGjLe
— ComicBook NOW! (@ComicBookNOW) December 19, 2020
So how would you describe two slices of Hawaii’s favorite canned animal parts topped with black cookie and Thousand Island-like goo?
Well, on the website, that’s called “tender and juicy.”
Also:
“Full of meatiness”
Let’s not forget:
“An unimaginable double surprise”
And:
“(With) a hint of sweet aftertaste”
All of the above can be found on the Big M’s site — in China.
Speaking with CNN Travel, McDonald’s China Communication Manager Abbie Xie explained, “Luncheon meat is a trending food among youngsters nowadays.”
So that’s the Less Filling; maybe this is the Tastes Great:
“The flavorful and crispy Oreo, on the other hand, is a snack youngsters are familiar with.”
Call it a conversation piece — “Excuse me, are you eating something completely disgusting?” “Why, yes, I am.”
“By creatively combining the two foods, it doesn’t only showcase the collision of tastes and textures, it is also quite topical socially.”
Bottom line: The unexpected combo satisfies.
“It has a very strong meaty and satisfying texture.”
To be clear, like your favorite jacket from the 80’s, the satisfactory sandwich is available for members only.
And it was only served for one day — it’s part of a series in which every Monday sees a different limited-run item for China McD’s “members.”
As noted by CNN, a voucher was released for members to purchase the tasty treat for RMB13.14 ($2).
Those things sold like hotcakes — if hotcakes were gross:
“We had a total of 400,000 Oreo luncheon meat burgers, available at about 3,700 branches across China — each branch had a limited supply. The burgers were sold out by noon in some branches. The overall sale was good and there were some fierce discussions on social media sites.”
Nevertheless, reviews were mixed.
One social media user observed, “There is no need to release unnecessary products.”
That remark garnered 2,000+ “likes.”
But one customer felt they’re onto somethin’:
“Oreos and luncheon meat are surprisingly delicious [together]. I thought the sweetness and the savory wouldn’t match but it was unexpectedly harmonious and tasty.”
The latest food mashup offered by McDonald's China featured two extra-thick slices of Spam — canned, cooked pork made by Hormel Foods Corporation — topped with Oreo crumbs and the brand's classic burger sauce. https://t.co/ZZL5aJM8b9 pic.twitter.com/WimCBjQpvH
— ABC7 News (@abc7newsbayarea) December 22, 2020
This critic from salt-loving Shandong ate it up:
“As someone from Shandong, I am quite fond of this level of saltiness. If you disregard the price tag and its miniature size, I’d give it 80 points (out of 100).”
But then you also had this:
“It wasn’t bad, but it couldn’t be considered tasty. The Oreo crumbs were everywhere. Swallow and you would completely forget about its taste.”
And let’s just go all the way down with it:
“It was sour and sweet and savory. I could taste the flavors of carsickness.”
So there ya go: Just one more reason — as if you needed another — to pack it all up and move to China.
Palatable ecstasy awaits.
With a dash of McMotion Sickness.
-ALEX
See more pieces from me:
All Heck Breaks Loose in Taiwan as Brawling Lawmakers Throw Pig Guts at Each Other
Find all my RedState work here.
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