Take a Peek Into Portland's Drive-Thru Strip Joint, and Gawk Over Its Name for Disrobed Deliveries

In this Wednesday, Aug. 29, 2018 photo provided by Yanny Bruere, a blimp of London Mayor Sadiq Khan is photographed in a workshop, in Oxfordshire, England. Critics of London Mayor Sadiq Khan have been given permission to fly a giant balloon depicting him dressed in a bikini over London. Last month Khan angered some opponents when he allowed a similar giant blimp depicting Donald Trump as an angry baby to fly over London during the president’s visit. (Yanny Bruere/via AP)

 

 

Last month, I covered a strip club in Las Vegas launching a drive-thru. It was a genius move, in light of the coronavirus collapse. And as it turns out, fully-nude club Little Darlings is not alone. Take a deep breath, ’cause we’re goin’ in deep — inside Portland’s own auto-erotic-as-fix-iation.

As reported by HuffPost, the idea of an idle-and-ogle transition came to Shon Boulden after his pair of clubs were dealt a “nonessential” knockdown by the city.

Like his now-COVID-compliant customers, Shon’s wheels started turning.

He eventually came up with a plan as nectarous as it was nekkid: Serve food and drinks to patrons in their Plymouths, courtesy of topless tootses.

Shon took an indirect route to the revelation: At first, he tried shirtless delivery: People could order from the bar’s kitchen, and the food would be brought to their doors by girls sporting pasties instead of pullovers.

The Idea man had conceived quite the name: Boober Eats.

[See the adults-only logo here].

Fast forward past a cease-and-desist letter from Uber [ 🙁 ], and the Lucky Devil Lounge landed on something more in-house.

Shon explains:

“Since food delivery started, we’ve had a lot of local businesses showing us support and wanting to collaborate. A local event company that sets up stages, tents, things like that, called us up and were like, ‘We’re out of business, we’re not doing anything.’ They offered to build us a huge tent, two stages, a DJ booth, a couple of stripper poles with lights, lasers, fog machines and were like, we’ll just see how it goes.”

Here’s how the whole thing works: You fork over 30 bucks, which lets you order any food item from the menu. Once you’re in the tent, you’re given a full show — a song or two for each vehicle — by masked, topless (though, it appears, pasty-protected), dancers. They give you your food, and you’re off with delicious delectables and a pandemic experience you’ll never forget.

And bonus: There are tip buckets inside, sure, but the girls also have trash-pickup rods to snatch the cash right from your risk-free hands.

HuffPost relayed, “The drive-thru has proven even more lucrative than the original food delivery program, though they’re still providing that service, too.”

Shon says the tent of tastiness is attracting drooling drivers from all over:

“We had a carload of girls from Seattle — two and a half hours away — do a road trip down to Portland to our drive-thru just to get some food and see this going on. It’s crazy.”

Toxic, one of the dancers, told HP the wheel-and-watch setup is doing her right:

“It’s helped my mood and my anxiety and depression during this entire [situation] because I get to have some type of artistic expression again. It’s great to feel sexy ― I just feel really invigorated.”

And she believes she’s making the pandemic’d planet a better place:

“You can just see our customer’s smiles ― I’m really happy we have this option for people. It’s even more exciting than the deliveries because they’re getting out of the house. It’s really nice.”

So there ya go — if you happen to be in Portland — or, perhaps, within 150 miles of it — stop in and get your fill of carbon monoxide, near-nudity and nachos.

And, according to the name of the joint, you’ll be one lucky devil.

-ALEX

 

See 3 more pieces from me:

In Response to Social Distancing, a Las Vegas Strip Club Opens a Drive-Thru

Absolutely Hilarious: After Sports Are Canceled, a Professional Commentator Takes to Narrating Mundane Daily Life for Your Pleasure

Party Like It’s 1799: Cops Bust Up an Amish Barn Bash for Violating Ohio’s Stay-at-Home Order

Find all my RedState work here.

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