It’s been a quiet week here in the Great Land, at least in South-Central, where a chilly, rainy spell has kept a lot of folks indoors and out of mischief. The rivers are running high and muddy, making fishing largely unproductive. 

Still – grouse season is open, and here in our game management unit moose become fair game very soon. That ought to bring some folks out into the bush. This will include me; early next month, my hunting buddy and loyal sidekick Rat (yes, that’s really what we call him) will be flying in from Colorado to hunt some grouse and, maybe, if the opportunity presents itself, to help me process a moose.

But that’s not what you’re here to read about, so…

Good news! Two Olympic gold medals for an Alaskan! Homer’s own Kristen Faulkner, a cyclist, is one happy camper just now.

On Sunday, Faulkner won a gold medal in road cycling, stunning the world.

Just three days later, she was one of four cyclists who led Team USA to a win over New Zealand in the women’s team pursuit finals.

Ken Castner, Homer’s mayor, was on a ferry from Homer to Ketchikan when Faulkner secured her second gold medal.

“Word spread through the ferry within 10 minutes after the race was over — because I was in the cafeteria — I stood up and said, ‘An athlete from Homer just won her second gold.’ Cheer, and then people were congratulating me ... like I won the medal,” he said with a laugh.

Alaska Man score: 5 moose nuggets. You made us all proud, Kristen.

See Related: WATCH: Steph Curry Becomes an Olympic Legend With Must-See 4th Quarter to Win Men's Basketball Gold

Note: Wear your seatbelt. In Palmer, Justin Steele did not have his belt on, prompting a stop – and now he’s in the pokey for failure to comply with the conditions under which he was… let out of the pokey. Dumb attack!

On 8/9/24 at approximately 0100 hours AST conducted a traffic stop on Colony Way in Palmer. The passenger who was not wearing a seatbelt was identified as Justin Steele, 44 of Sutton. Justin was found to have an active warrant for Failure to Comply with Conditions of Release for a Felony. Justin was remanded to Mat-Su Pretrial and bail was set at $1000.

You know, a seatbelt is just a good all-around idea, but it’s just as well that Mr. Steele is back in the crowbars. He doesn’t show much good sense, and now he's probably back where he belongs. At least, as of this writing; we have not seen an indication that he made bail.

Alaska Man score: 1.25 of 5 moose nuggets. While Steele acted stupidly and got caught, as crooks often do, at least he gave us something to point and laugh at.

And, it happens here too. Up in Pilot Station, on the Yukon River, their acting mayor and city clerk have been charged with election interference.

According to an indictment filed July 30, Pilot Station acting mayor Arthur Heckman Sr. and city clerk Ruthie Borromeo each face eight felony counts for alleged violations of state election laws in October 2022 and October 2023.

The charges include attempting to induce an election official to fail in their duties through force, threat, intimidation, or offers of reward; delaying the sending of required election materials; intentionally failing to perform election duties; and tampering with election returns.

Heckman Sr. also faces an additional eight misdemeanor counts for allegedly soliciting the crimes outlined in the felony charges.

Shame on everyone involved. Not even a little Alaska bush community, it seems, is safe from election shenanigans. No moose nuggets for this; not even one.

See Related: Trump Campaign Hacked by Foreign Government and Documents Sent to Media

And finally, and on a brighter note: Check out the Kamala Harris Weight Loss program!