The Worst Possible GOP Candidate for 2016: Lindsay Graham

What To Expect From A Graham Administration
What To Expect From A Graham Administration

It took two insignificant events for [mc_name name=”Sen. Lindsey Graham (R-SC)” chamber=”senate” mcid=”G000359″ ] to become the worst possible GOP candidate for 2016. First, John Huntsman had to become independent in the proud tradition of Lincoln Chafee, and then !RONPAUL! had to hang-up whatever it is that certified nut-jobs hang up when they retire. With the entrenched professional nobodies out of the way, there was a hole in the GOP roster. The position of Republican Who Is Virtually Worthless On Almost Every Issue was there for the taking. The only things missing were online ads on Craig’s List and

Well, if nature abhors a vacuum; The Great State of South Carolina has a candidate that sucks like an Electrolux. He even has a built-in campaign slogan guaranteed to make 85% of the GOP Base stay home. “We’re gonna’ tell the bigots to shut up!” He, of course did not mean The National Council of La Raza.

The only reason people consider this man credible at all is that he represents a state where elected Republicans are removed from office feet first, on a stretcher, at the end of their natural lifespan. He is further elevated far above his level of intellect and potential by the fact that he has historically opposed Dovish foreign policy positions and we currently have Barack Obama double and triple-bogeying every hole of the Defense and Diplomacy Open. This makes some people hold the simplistic belief that a known tough-guy like Tassle-Loafered Lindsey would be just the guy to take down ISIS good and hard. He’s even been encouraged to run by none other than our friend Senator John “I made hope and change possible in 2008” McCain.

“I’ve strongly encouraged him to give it a look. I think Lindsey has vast and deep experience on these issues that very few others have. I happen to like a lot of these guys—I like Jeb Bush, Chris Christie. [mc_name name=’Sen. Ted Cruz (R-TX)’ chamber=’senate’ mcid=’C001098′ ] has gone out of his way to tell people how much he agrees with me on national security.”

Lindsay Graham is also memorable for being the man who helped President Clinton turn the 1998 impeachment into a total joke. He is not a credible presence. I don’t see how someone who can’t make a credible impression as a person can lead a nation to war. He may claim to be a hawk, but I’m afraid I just don’t see Lindsay Graham scaring the world’s rodents all that much. Also, if his idea of border security is to help La Raza tell the bigots to shut up, then I’m pretty much thinking ISIS could open up its own version of I-95 across our Southern Border if Lindsay Graham were in The White House.

In conclusion, American foreign policy has been misled and mismanaged to the point where a war will have to be fought against ISIS that will unfortunately involve a lot of American ground troops being sent to some of the world’s most uninviting places. This will probably require a president who if he’s not a hawk should at least be a raptor. The danger here is picking a fake hawk who speaks loudly and carries a whiffle bat. Lindsay Graham has been weighed in the balance and found to have an atomic weight just slightly more substantial than the helium that he emits from the podium. He would truly be the worst possible GOP candidate for Election 2016.

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