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In this episode of No, This Is Not From the Babylon Bee…

Just when you think conspiracy lunatic Alex Jones has ridden the crazy train to the end of the tracks, the infamous peddler of “false flag” nonsense extends his ride ever further. I mean, really further.

As we reported in October, the InfoWars host was ordered to pay $965 million in compensatory damages to Sandy Hook families following his years-long campaign in which he claimed the elementary school mass shooting was a hoax — or false flag operation — in which so-called “crisis actors” played grieving parents.

Despicable? Oh, hell yeah.

And now, as reported by Just the News, Jones claims the Biden Justice Department is considering making him give up the family cat in order to pay part of the massive award. So how can the sale of the Jones family cat — named Mooshu — come anywhere close to helping pay the damages, you ask?

Ladies and gentlemen, Alex Jones:

They wanted to know if assets were hidden in the cat. The cat was like $2,000. It is a Ragdoll cat. We really do love it. But they were very serious about the cat and its value, and they may want the cat for the Sandy Hook families.

Um. Okay, the cat is fluffy enough, and stuff, but really? How much money could you stuff inside a cat that size, let alone a live one?

Jones made it clear this week, in a video posted on Twitter, that he has no intention of giving up the cat — as if he has a say in anything related to the compensatory damages:

You guys aren’t getting the cat. This is next level. This is harassment. No one has ever heard of this. My lawyer has never heard of this. This is just insane.

Really, Alex?

Exclusive: DOJ investigates Alex Jones’s cat. Not Satire! pic.twitter.com/BteGs3OChu

— Erika Wulff Jones (@WulffJones) February 24, 2023

How next-level insane were your years of lying about Sandy Hook and the trauma you purposely heaped on the parents and other family members after 20-year-old Adam Lanza shot and killed 26 people?

Remember, Alex?

Twenty of the victims were children between six and seven years old, and the other six were adult staff members. Were you found guilty of harassment? No, Alex — you were ordered to pay nearly $1 billion in damages to 15 plaintiffs defamed by your lunatic conspiracy theory, about which you admitted you lied and that the Sandy Hook massacre was “real.”

Did Jones admit he lied because he honestly believed the Sandy Hook shooting occurred or did he just say so as a last-ditch effort to save his as avoid his ultimate fate? Oh, and that of Mooshu. He’s Alex Jones, what do you think?

The Bottom Line

Lunatics are lunatics; ego-maniacs are ego-maniacs, and serial liars are serial liars. In and of themselves they’re harmless — that is unless they have large enough followings to make them matter. 

Think about it.